Still Alive's Dear Diary

Dear Diary, Manon came over out if the blue the other day n hung out for a couple hours. We got along like two friends do. We talked about a few things n we agreed on a few things. Then i send him a casual text. Thwn another one. He was ignoring me a

Dear Diary, when I finally decided to tell Manon goodbye for good. That's when he decides it's time to come hang out with me. It was a little tense at first but then loosened up. I love him n I love being with him. It does make me really sad when he

Dear Diary, I actually said goodbye to Manon tonight n I meant it. I have to let go. I'm only hurting myself. It hurts like hell. I was hanging on to any thread. But it's been so many years it's so hard to accept it. All I'm doing is pushing him fart

Dear Diary, and again I found an excuse to text Manon. A few times n it's not even noon yet. Of course no reply. N this is when I start getting angry. N if I let myself I can build myself up onto a total psycho bitch stage. I dont understand it. Cuz

Dear Diary, sometimes I just go nuts with Manon n his new girlfriend only a block away. I want to go up there n spy n maybe see him. I honestly hope I'll see them arguing. It really doesnt matter though. It only leaves me feeling even more lonely tha

Dear Diary, after friends leave n u know no more will b coming by is when the loneliness starts creeping in. It's when I want to text Manon. And I usually do. But i have to stop cuz it's just setting me up to get hurt. He ignores me, isnt even a frie

Dear Diary, started seeing this guy a little while ago n it turns out he was just playing me. It took alot for me to trust someone again after Manon left me like he did. Now this guy is just a fucking dog. Are there any good men left in the world or

Dear Diary, I got my moms death certificate today. Makes it seem much more real. We had our differences but I loved my mom very much. Some of my friends dont understand because she wasnt always the nicest. But she raised 5 kids alone so I think she d

Dear Diary, one of the hardest things for me to deal with since Manon left me is that there is no reason for doing anything. When he was here I did things because of him, around him n for him. Now I dont care.

Dear Diary, another night barely any sleep. I used to wake up n cry missing my cat of 15 years who passed away. Then I would wake up n cry because my boyfriend of almost 20 years left me. Just when I think I will b able to sleep night n have a good m

Dear Diary, am feeling extremely empty n lonely. I've lost alot. It's not just losing a boyfriend/friend of all these years. It's the unspoken plans. The knowledge that ass hole as he could b he would b there at the end of the day. Not even thinking

Dear Diary, I have tried to get him to answer a message or a phone. I don't know why I do this to myself. Cuz now I sit here crying. I cant stand when he ignores me. It drives me nuts then I do stupid shit which just makes him ignore me more. It's a

Dear Diary, I wrote massive texts to my x last night. None of them mean or loving. Still trying to hold onto that friendship I thought we had for the past 20 years.

Dear Diary, things r still a mess as far as the will goes. All I want is a little piece of my mom to hold dear. But my niece has all of her things n I have no idea why. I think she is the one that got everything all screwed up.  I have got to get ov

Dear Diary, I always thought things would get easier as we got older. When in all actuality it gets harder. My life is always such a mess.