Bhavu🤓's Dear Diary

Index
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------ wants a platonic romantic relationship with someone. Platonic cuddles and playing with hair, just as bros tho. Im totally up for that, but I dont know if I can give them that because Im pretty sure its something Ive barred myself from. In the
Dec 02
10/5/20
I could literally scream right now. I want to. Its crawling inside me. I have no motivations. No hope right now. I wish I could drop out of school, stop eating, maybe just disappear. I know it wont fix anything though. I want to talk about what I wri
Dec 02
9/27/20
Me corte hoy. 10:15 pm el mulso, hombro, y cadera izquierda. No sabe exactamente por que, pero lo hice. Creo que soy adicto. Quiero sentir la sensacion una vez mas. Soy enferma. I wonder why humans were created. My wording of that makes me wonder
Dec 02
9/16/20
Ive been thinking of cutting recently and I dont know why. It just feels like something I should try again, without knowing the reason. I think that deep down in my brain, there is definitely something wrong with me, and Im in denial which is why I c
Dec 02
8/31/20
I dont like thinking about this diary, because its a house for negativity. Within this journal is the history of the worst part of my life so far. but I cant bring myself to get rid of it. Deep down theres a part of me that still suffers, and relies
Dec 02
11/29/20 On Shifting
Before you read: recently I've gotten really into the topic of reality shifting, you might have seen it on tik tok, but there's a lot more to learn about it on other platforms like amino and youtube and I recommend you look into it because it really
Nov 29
5/3/20
I know im late to writing this but who cares. On 3/20/20 i felt like shit. It was around 4 am when i wrote the entry, and after completing it I contacted the crisis hotline. In the middle of that conversation I ended up texting ---- and I told her po
May 03
3/20/20
We all do different things at night. Some sleep, others play games, do homework, whatever. Some people do other things, some people think about death, and how they dont know why theyre feeling, and how much pain is going through them. At night, i oft
Mar 21
3/1/20
I feel like I'm going to explode. I literally cannot keep holding this in. I want to tear myself to shreds. I don't want to go to moms, the atmosphere there is sickly, and I've got about 15 different blades there. At my dads I don't have to worry abo
Mar 01
2/27/20
I've been doing better. Today I talked to ------ about alternatives and ways to cope with suicidal thoughts. We weren't talking about me though, we were talking about him. I didn't really know what to say at first, but I took the more caring and caut
Feb 28
2/17/20
It's not necessarily that I want to die. It's more of 'why should I stick around if I'm not needed?' I cant say its selfish either. I feel at peace with leaving. I've been reassured and know that my friends are fine without me. Why can't I leave if t
Feb 25
2/16/20
I think it's inevitable that I'm going to at least attempt suicide one day. Even if I don't want to, it's going to happen. Something will push me over the edge and I'll do it. I'll ignore the consequences and try to kill myself, and hey, maybe someon
Feb 25
2/11/20
on the 7th, a teacher asked me if I fought with my parents. She said she could tell because I always have a pleasant disposition at school. I guess someone finally noticed that I'm never sad at school. I can't be unless I try. I tried on the 6th and
Feb 25
2/5/20
I wonder what people think when they read these journals online. Maybe they see some selfish bitch who just wants attention. I started posting these so that I would feel a little less alone, so that maybe someone else would know what I'm going throug
Feb 25
2/4/20
I can feel the hole in me. It makes it hard to breathe. It hurts. I want to die. not literally. I want to feel. I don't know what I want. Whether its punishment or love. I just want this void to disappear. I always think that it wouldn't be so bad to
Feb 25
October 02, 2019
Dear Diary,since last few days I get these bad like horrible dreams while I'm trying to sleep at night and they scare me and I just wake up in middle and my heart is beating fast, I am scared and crying and I dunno what am I suppose to do! Then I'm j
Oct 02
September 28, 2019
Dear Diary, So yesterday was a both great and sad day for me...cuz of different reasons... So, this Saturday was a holiday for me from office! So, I woke up asusual and then like was thinking about my dream...I mean it's sometimes some people don
Sep 28
September 14, 2019
Dear Diary, Today met Kumar after a long time and trust me it's really good to meet him, Like we discussed few things about the work and products and some general stuff!This person gives me so much of positive vibes rather say energy, motivation, con
Sep 14
September 07, 2019
Dear Diary, Yeah.... Felt like scribbling my thoughts out after a long time... I don't even remember the last time I wrote anyways so there has been many things happening with me ( I am God's favorite I guess 😅 )Learning new things... I mean I alwa
Sep 07
July 20, 2019
Such a fucked up feeling..is there a way by which I can just skip that one day of my life and just can be Happy?? People Generally get excited for there birthdays me on other hand gets so Fucking nervous I just hate this feeling it's like when u have
Jul 20
July 12, 2019
Dear Diary, Something is wrong I don't know what is wrong but I feel too sad n low I mean bas rone ka maan karta hai..Being with people around still feeling lonely n just too lonely half of the time I just pretend to be really happy n cheerful b
Jul 12
July 10, 2019
Dear Diary, yesterday was fully a unpredictable day 😉I was having good time doing my work and enjoying my songs then I had appointment with doctor but the that stupid didn't turned up and I was so negative that why things are not fine ?? Why things
Jul 10
June 29, 2019
Dear Diary, Today was a good day for me... Since morning was busy with my works and like mood was also not that good was upset for some reasons but then....Evening was good me, akshay and varun took vogo and went to our favorite place... The bre
Jun 29
June 18, 2019
Dear Diary, Yesterday I wanted to write but I wasn't able to cuz till the time I reached my room it was already 12:45 and I was damn tired. Many things happened yesterday like it was good and bad like u can say a day with UPS and downs. My roo
Jun 18
May 31, 2019
Dear Diary, Too much annoyed n frustrated today.. cuz I feel my health is not good these days.... Cuz of that I have started being too irritated I just don't know what to do??? I have no energy I feel like I'm a lifeless soul in a body...cuz
May 31
May 26, 2019 Sunday Story
Dear Diary, Menmories how one can explain this word?? I have no clue... Like was having a clam Sunday after a long time no plans no outings kinda me time....I thought let's see what all can be deleted from my phone that would empty the space and
May 26
May 24, 2019
Dear Diary, Every day can't be a perfect day right?? Like every time u can't be happy sometimes u feel up giving up on everything and just being damn alone n just cry n cry.. today was that kinda day for meI was literally too frustrated n annoye
May 24
May 20, 2019
Dear Diary, Today was a good day for me. I learned new things out of my silly mistakes. I realized yes I'm capable of doing good work n yes I should trust myself n work for my happiness n not get stressed over small n stupid things. Overthi
May 20
May 19, 2019
Dear Diary, I have a question tell me why the Fuck people judge u when they don't even know ur story?? When they don't know what u going through every day??? You know when u at low even the small actions and words n every small thing make u disc
May 19
May 19, 2019
Dear Diary, It was an amazing evening for me today. We friends went to the burger stories n had some mouth watering, delicious n yummy meal.  Then we guys went to inorbit mall n had fun there in the play zone area.We were actually playing like scho
May 18