October 29, 2022

 

Dear ghost,

I have been walking, walking and sometime stumbling. But when I look back, "Uh, I have not been living a great life huh?" That's what I think. I have just been trying, sometimes I succeeded and sometimes I did not. I did not want it to be great but I wanted to feel great. That could have been possible only when I did not have any regret. But as it drips out of me. As I row, I have many remorse.

 Especially you, you were the most kind. The most tall. The most agreeable but I became the reason you stumbled in life. You said you forgive me but I, being a coward, could just stand there as I wasted a year out of your life. You did not blame me. You did not hated me. Maybe you might have in some days but you did not reprimand me. That's why it hurts more. That's why this guilt never goes. 

Even when you came back to visit, I did not go to visit you. Even when you texted me, the thrones in my heart made me ghost you. As long as I live, it shall with be. And that shall be my punishment.



Your ruin






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