him

 

Dear Diary, i have a hard time because i think about him a lot. when i tell him how i’m feeling it makes me feel better but i always feel so annoying and obnoxious when i do. he always responds apathetically, used to i liked that, now it hurts my feelings. he’s told me multiple times he doesn’t mind my ramblings but i have a hard time believing him. i don’t really believe anything he tells me. i wish i could, maybe then it wouldn’t be so difficult to manage. he acts like he doesn’t like talking to me anymore, it feels like i’m just a chore to him, it would be easier if he just told me…

sometimes i’m jaded and rude when i speak to him, sometimes i’m apologetic and sulky. for some reason it so hard for me to act normal because i get in my head about every single interaction we have. anything i do makes me feel bad. i just keep wishing i would get a text notifying me when my next therapy session is. 

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