July 01, 2022

 

Dear Diary,


We had a disagreement recently, she and her bestfriend have "girl talk" which I tried to tolerate for a while but she told me that there was something she told him but I wasn't allowed to know. 


After rambling about how recently I felt a big drop in our relationship I guess that made her a little more understanding of my need to know. She keeps brushing it off as jealousy issues but I guess its my fault for not speaking up. I want to tell her how betrayed I feel, how I feel cheated on and neglected when she talks to people and I'm not allowed to know whats being said but I don't want to start a fight because I know she wouldn't take it well. Generally I don't mind it but if I ask specifically about a topic and she says I'm not allowed to know for my own good it makes me feel cheated on and betrayed. 


I told her before that I felt this way and she said I was being a bitch about it because she didn't want to tell me for my own good and I made a big deal about it. 


I know for a fact I'm not in the wrong, in what world are you allowed to tell people secrets but tell your significant other "no" when they want to know especially when its important. Thats not transparent and honest, its blatant disrespect of the relationship and your partener. She likes that I want to be all knowing of who she talks to and what is said until the time actually comes when I ask about something. 


I understand her point in wanting to protect me from whatever it is but not knowing something is the biggest fear to have. People are afraid of what they don't know and because particurly need to know, it makes it even more amplified. 

Loading...
Comments