[ENTRY 81..✍️]
I was waiting outside the biggest mall in the city located at the seaside for my date last Sunday afternoon, three days ago. With Chace's desperation to ease his pain, he met someone from Bumble and it led me to install the dating app, too, just around two weeks prior. With Valentine's coming, it somehow injected a bit of pressure in me to find someone already because I've never ever had a Valentine before. I've never been out with a guy during the 14th of February and like I've been saying here, I want to experience these things now. I've encountered a few interesting people on Bumble, the ones I want to meet, but before I go out with these guys, I wanted to have a practice first because my last date was literally still from two years back. And then this one guy whom I've only exchanged a few messages with invited me out and since I didn't care about him, I said yes. All of his pictures aren't of good quality and he doesn't have one selfie. They're almost all stolen and the face is always blurry. My expectations were already low and I even worried about him having a… well, I don't want to sound shallow but unfortunately, I am, and I've always been into fit guys. Or at least, someone who has an overall nice build. Regardless, I didn't dwell too much on his looks because he was just a trial and error, anyway.
I was sitting alone at a marbled bench chatting with him on the phone when a guard that roams around started talking to me. He asked if I was fully vaccinated and whether I brought my vaccination card.
"Yes, I'm just waiting for someone," I told him.
"Don't you want to wait inside? It's nicer over there."
True, and drier. It's been raining these days but I replied with: "It's okay. It's so cold there."
"Who are you waiting for? Your boyfriend?"
This question suddenly made me shy and evinced a chuckle from my lips. "Nah. Just a friend."
He'd go away and inspect surrounding areas and come back again. Eventually, he asked for my name and where I was situated and at this point, it was pretty obvious he was hitting on me. But it was so weird when a man carrying a massive firearm is flirting with you. Is this even okay? Reluctantly, he managed to ask for my number and I didn't think twice about showing him my hesitation because I seriously didn't want to give him my digits at all.
"Uhh…" I thought for a while, my eyebrows wincing and eyes squinting in an emphasized display of uncertainty. I don't like giving away my number to just a random stranger. But damn it, he had a giant weapon. He was literally carrying it in both arms. After a minute or two, I just said, "Okay."
"Alright.. Hang on." His attention was definitely divided between his job and my company as he'd look around every now and then. For a moment, it seemed to me as if he was keeping an eye on whether someone was watching him letting himself distracted from his duty or that he was doing something inappropriate.. He slowly stepped away to probably get a paper or something. Haha. I make it sound so old school but I don't know if they're allowed to carry phones during their schedule.
My date told me he was wearing brown and when I received a message from him asking what I was wearing myself, I turned around and found a guy in a brown sweatshirt standing just a couple of yards away from my spot, looking at his phone. I immediately called the guard and told him, "Oh, wait! I'm so sorry. My friend is already here." I gestured towards my date whilst beginning to stand.
"Oh… That's him?"
"Yes."
And then I walked away but I felt somehow bad. I truly saw the disappointment in the guard's eyes. He was probably desperate for a Valentine, too, or maybe he just really hits on random women who are sitting alone. But my, my… My worries were proven absolutely wrong because my date looks like an oppa! When I first saw him, I immediately noticed his tall and good physique and neatness. He dresses nice, too. I came up to him and I'm not sure if I hugged him but I probably did.
"Ohh, your arrival is such good timing!" I gushed then imparted to him my interaction with the guard and expressed my relief of not having to give my number anymore to the latter.
He looked absolutely handsome with a mask on and I ventured to wonder about the face underneath it. I'm not really into Korean dramas nor am I into Korean men but I do have one Korean crush that really made me giggle upon randomly stumbling into this series called "Gangnam Beauty" or something like that. I had the biggest crush on the main male actor there. I don't know his name but I find him really attractive.
When I think of "oppa", what comes to mind is usually the handsome leading man from all those romantic K-dramas and my date was giving off these vibes even though he's not really Korean. Au contraire, he's part Chinese and Spanish, but his eyes... Bah, he is an oppa. I made sure to wear high-wedge shoes because I knew he was going to be tall like Chace. He was really touchy and I just went along with it because I missed this kind of contact. It made me feel warm and protected. He'd hold my hand as we walked around the mall or put his arm on top of my shoulders. Or I'd wrap my arm around his. I couldn't help noticing how adorable our height difference was when we'd pass glasses and mirrors inside the mall.
"Omg, look at us!" I stopped in front of a tinted glass wall and pointed at our reflection. "We look so cute. Hahaha."
"Yes, you are so petite."
In another instance, he was the one who stopped in front of a glass wall to have another look at our pairing and I absolutely enjoyed regarding us because it made me think of anime. At first, when he'd hold my hand, it was just palm to palm. Eventually, I relaxed more and our fingers intertwined. He's way too extroverted for me but it was nice because he has a lot of stories to tell. But I don't know if that's really my type. I've always preferred quiet and mysterious guys over the life of the party.
We were displaying skin-to-skin affections that would invite assumptions from strangers that we were lovers because I became somewhat comfortable touching him like that and him to me. Maybe because he turned out to be cute.
For dinner, he wanted a burger (said it was his cheat day) and I wanted a carbonara but we couldn't find a restaurant that served both, so I stated: "Let's just eat separately and meet up afterwards." He laughed out loud at this suggestion and instead, pulled my hand to scour for more places. I think I'm really bad at this but I often hear men don't like it when women can't decide what to eat and I'm always firm with pasta carbonara because it's my favourite.
After more strolls, we finally settled at a food court (masks off, finally). He had pizza and I had some kind of Italian dish. We sat side-by-side on a long, cushioned seat, and we chatted and laughed and I'd put my head on his shoulder, and he kept smelling the top of my head and planting kisses on it because he said it smelled so good and fresh. It was almost like my first date with that aerodrome firefighter three years ago except that this oppa was more physically affectionate. I should probably set a name for him now. Let's call him Erwin (yes, from "Attack on Titans'' because he's around his height and age.)
It was an informal setting so I could put my legs over one of his because to be honest, it was so cold and I was wearing a dress that stopped above my knee and the warmth of our closeness gave comfort to my temperature. It even came to a point where I was almost lying on the bench but I only had my head on his chest and he was cradling me as he told me personal supernatural stories or past relationships, his favourite animes from his childhood, etc. Of course, I shared some of my experiences as well but I wasn't as open as him because I am a reserved person, not to mention awkward and bad at storytelling.
After dinner, we went to the skypark to chill under the stars. The mall was beginning to close by this time so the area was almost empty and some of the lights were already off. He seemed very determined to get me into a secluded and dark spot (to be honest, deep down, I wanted it too haha but I was playing this innocent girl who just follows) and when we found ourselves settled on the marbled steps, we held each other again side-by-side and his embrace to me became more familiar. As we talked, he'd plant kisses on my cheek and I could really detect his desire to kiss me on the lips by this point. And he did. But it was lousy. It was almost a smack though our lips parted.
"Is anyone around?" he muttered under his breath whilst quickly surveying the surroundings. We sneakily tried again and it was almost just as quick as the first. Just two seconds. Lmfao. Though he was attractive, I wasn't really feeling him. There were no sparks. I didn't mind not seeing him ever again. Besides, I guess I have been charming and still know how to interact with men one-on-one. Or at least, I hope so. All in all, it was a success. We had a tacit agreement that it wasn't a good place to make out although my ulterior reason was I was uncomfortable because some guard might flash a light on us or something and tell us to go. I mean, we basically had to wear masks at all times and I didn't want to be caught having my tongue tied to someone else's in a public place where these certain protocols were to be followed. Hoo-wow! What a good citizen I sound like, huh. Am I really being true to myself or am I just making an excuse to hide the fact that I didn't like him. Haha.
When we stood up to go, I suddenly had the urge to grab his head and kiss him. But it's just probably the height difference and how it would look cute because it made me think of Kyohei and Sunako from a rom-com anime my older sister is still so crazy about (I forgot the title but it has a "The Wallflower" in it). This idea legit turns me on, envisioning the image from the eye of an onlooker. We parted ways at the City Wing exit because it was the direction where I had to catch a ride and he had to turn back to go to another wing for his. We definitely hugged this time, for sure.
When he was gone, I immediately messaged another guy to come pick me up because at 8:30pm, I still didn't want to go home.
To be continued...
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