Dear Diary,
Kemper is finally asleep!
I have been having this thought lately and I’m trying so hard to get rid of it. Kemper is giving me a reason lately to be outside of myself, if that makes any sense. But I’m worried that when he gets better and things get back to normal, that I will actually do it.
I’m just going to focus on the now. He needs me and I like caring for him.
I’m having such a hard time and I don’t know why. Kemper is here and he treats me amazingly. Yet…none of it is enough.
I have determined it is me. I’m broken! Something just isn’t right with me and I’m sinking and I can’t snap out of it. It just gets worse and worse. I hate being me! I can’t escape myself.
I’m kind of relieved Kemper is sick and needs me. It helps keep the bad thoughts at bay.