July 29, 2019
Dear Diary,
I'm really tired of working almost everyday. I know I have to tho, since we live in a capitalistic society where money is seen as a necessity. So today I want to dedicated this entry to my job.
So I'm a cashier. I hate my job. I hate having to give fake smiles all day, why can't I just have a neutral face? Not smiling doesn't mean being impolite. Plus, we're people too, we can feel bad some days.
One of the thing I hate the most is being obliged to give plastic bags to people. I'm pro environment so when I see someone with only one item ask for a bag it frustrates me. Or when I ask someone if they want one and they replied: "It's not like I'm gonna put my items in my pockets".
...
Yes? Or you also have hands? Don't get sarcastic with me please. I understand when people with loads of things ask for one, but if I can carry it, so should you.
Another thing that I'm not particularly trilled about is the rude clients. But I guess no one really like these people. I'm very sensible and a bad client can ruin my week. I've cried because of some. Sometimes I know it's not really my fault, a person is just having a bad day and they found the smallest things to be mad at me for.
I think that having a goal, like knowing what I want to do with my life, would help. But I really don't know what my future's gonna look like. I want to help people, to change the world, even if it's just in a small way. If I had the charisma, I would go into politics to try to save our planet. If I had the brain, I would become a scientist to find some new inventions.
I'm gonna quit my job soon, I already told my bosses. It's kinda bittersweet, I really like my co-workers but yeah...I have to go. Gonna find something where I don't have to show my face that much.
I have to work because my mom don't have much money. I've never really had any of the "cool" technologies other people my age would get, and I didn't want to ask my mom for them since she would just be sad that she can effort them. So I always knew I wouls have to work to pay my education, my clothes and some things I want. Now that I get paid tho, I can buy things for my mom so I'm happy about that.
I have a friend who never had to worry about money. She lives with her two parents in a house they've finished buying. They pay for her school, food, clothes, and she can ask fancy things for Christmas. Sometimes she wanna go out and when I tell her I can't because I don't have money right now, she says: "Well don't buy video games if you want to keep your money". What is wrong if, from time to time, I want to get myself something nice? I rarely spend my money on things I don't need (I still have old clothes from high school), and when I do, I tends to feel guilty for it. Ugh...
I think I'm done talking about this, I have to get up early tomorrow (again) for work. I'll write again.
Axl 🍑
A
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