Dear Diary,
I got a lot of time to kill today .
I've been on a philosophical train of thoughts these few days. It always seems to be following this pattern and I'm not able to break it.
Days of crazy turmoil , then gradually seeping into master. Shifu mode for a while, then a brief spell of nothing , then going back on the same loop.
Anyways,about my thoughts.... I've been reading a book by a very successful guy about business and Si valley. In one of the paragraphs , he talks in brief the history of man. It's not an important part in the book, he just uses it to get to his point, yet I got stuck there.
I was just awestruck by how much history there was to my species and yet, I knew nothing much beyond the last few 100 years. Can you imagine a man, taking birth as the most advanced species on earth ,living out a life for approx. 80 years doing various things, and then dying out one random day, all the while not knowing (inspite of having the ability to) where he came from, the history of his ancestors, how he came to be here, all the pains and sufferings his people underwent so he could have this advanced luxurious life?
We get so engrossed in our quests on making money, comparing our lives to others, just bitching and complaining , try ing to make every person in our life happy,.. we forget to take note of how lucky we are to be born as a human being,... All those ancestors who sacrificed their lives during ice age, the great plague, ww's...Maybe if we read a little about them, we'd learn to appreciate our lives a little more. I know I haven't. I should probably.
I feel very disappointed in my country. I've always had this idea of moving out. Today I saw a youtube video of a man trolling a woman talking about women's religious rights. She was pointing out things very politely and scientifically and he couldn't get back at her logically, so he started mimicking her hand gestures and tone of speech and accent to prove his logic. In the tackiest way possible. The comments section were full of people supporting him and doing the same troll circus.That woman is old enough to be his mom. I felt disgusted. I could be her in the next 20 years and I don't think the landscape of this country would still change. It's sad. What happened to sanathana dharma?
I find it kind of weird that most people of other religions are compulsorily made to study their religion, while in my religion it's not. It's funny that on paper I belong to one religion, and yet I've not fully read any of its holy texts atleast once. Not even a translation. Most of us have no trouble dissing our religion but we won't even make an attempt to understand it. And because of this, when these right wing idiots come and make sensitive comments and stupid claims about what's in the books, and what's not, idk what to make of it...Who to believe and who not, because I've no conviction of what's in those books myself.
I even felt more shameful when I came across a beautiful sanskrit poem recital by an english woman. She knows so much more of my culture and heritage than myself. I couldn't even understand a word of what she was saying. What a shame
-_-
New year was ages ago, but I'd still like to resolve to learn my religion better before I declare myself an atheist. Make a sense of it myself, before turning to others to interpret it for me.
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