[ENTRY 87..✍️]

So about that guy I was supposed to meet last time.. Well, we went out the other night in the same place I had my first date with Erwin. That location is really convenient for me because it's just near my residence. When I messaged him what he was wearing before I headed out, I almost didn't want to go because his reply was: "Black suit."

Me: "A suit? Dude, I'm only wearing a sweatshirt…"

I legit stressed out about my outfit for five minutes. I figured since we were going to arrive there at 8pm, we'd only have a little time to hang out so I didn't put too much thought about looking extra nice. Just what kind of fancy place did he think we would be going?

Him: "Jk. Gray t-shirt and black shorts. Haha."

The bastard.

The moment I arrived, I saw a guy in the outfit he exactly described carrying a black bagpack getting out of a taxi ahead of me. I didn't call his attention yet for I wanted to observe him first. He walked inside and I trailed behind. I'm telling you, there's truly some kind of fun following people. Not the first time I've done it. Ssh.. Haha. He would look around and then check his phone...

"I'm here," said a text from him.

"Me too," I replied and with this, he turned around and spotted me. We stood there looking at each other for a few seconds before we started moving again to closer our gap and said greetings I have forgotten. He wanted to drink tea because he just had dinner so we walked around for a bit and when he saw a cinnamon shop, he led the way there to order a hot cup of tea and a cinnamon roll.

"Do you want to have anything?" he asked.

I figured I should at least order something because it would be weird to sit at the same table with someone and that person is the only one eating while you're there just awkwardly staring at them. It took me a while to pick what I wanted but I've always preferred iced drinks so I got some kind of cold, chocolate-y stuff whose name I have also forgotten. I was about to pay it when the cashier inquired, "Aren't you with him?" She pointed to my date who had already sat at a nearby table.

"Yes," I answered.

"It's already paid."

"Oh..."

I forgot if I have uttered my thanks but, anyway, the confounding thing gave me diarrhea. We sat vis-à-vis for several minutes chit-chatting and as usual, my company was talking more and I was this curious listener. His pictures didn't give justice to what he looks like in person at all. He is so much cuter. I didn't know why I didn't get shy especially when those beautiful, big, brown eyes of his would focus on my face. Maybe because my insecurities already had ideas of why he was staring at me like that and I kind of just accepted it.

Things like:

"Ah, this girl is so ugly in real life."

"I can't wait for this night to be over."

"Can I just go home now."

He urged me to finish my drink but my stomach began feeling unwell. Maybe because I didn't have dinner.

When we were sitting at the skypark a little while later because he wanted to explore the mall, I had my hand clutching my belly and I told him, "My stomach hurts."

"Why? Are you pregnant?" he asked.

"Yes. The baby's kicking," I replied and then we both burst into laughter.

He was really, really cute and his big, brown eyes were so warm and curious. Plus he was so talkative in a way that was very captivating. Maybe it was because of the hybrid accent. I could hear the French and a little bit of Italian and some other I could no longer distinguish. It was absolutely lovely! He's been to a lot of countries so he had a lot of interesting and informative stories to tell. He also speaks five languages including French and Italian, explaining the accents in these two. He was simply brilliant, charming, funny and so romantic. A tall, tanned, 27-year old foreign man with brown, curly hair and a handsome physique who's only here on vacation. He was such a prince, I'm telling you. He is so polite and he doesn't curse. Well, not usually. When we talked about this, he said he only curses in Spanish but only the feeble ones. And when I went all: "Puta de madre!" to flex my Spanish humourously, because, you know, ahem, I speak Spanish now—he laughed out loud and it was the most adorable thing.

We walked around the dim and almost empty park and when we stopped to watch the ocean and city lights from our view above, he suddenly asked, "Do you know how to dance?"

I immediately snorted and said, "Not at all. My sisters say my feet are both left."

"Oh, but this one's easy. Here." Then he played music from his phone and took my hands.

"Oh, a partner dance!" I exclaimed.

"Yes. This is called bacacha." (Tbh, I forgot the name but it sounded like that.)

He guided me how to do it and yes, it was pretty easy but my eyes were on the ground the whole time because I was looking at our feet. There was actually a time when I used to dance on stage or in front of an audience but over the years of having not done it anymore, I guess I lost my skills along the way hence my awkward moves now.

Steps to the left…

To the right…

And then he twirled me around.

I really had a problem with the twirl because I'd get confused which way to turn. My brain wasn't fed enough for me to have a sharper mind that's why some of the things from the date also failed to retain in my head, as you may have already noticed. And because of my low blood sugar, walking around got me breathy plus my ears popped and didn't return to its normal state for some time. Way to have the best mental and physical condition on a date with an amazing guy.

We danced for a few more minutes and although I really wanted to dance some more, the twirls were beginning to make me dizzy. I wondered if anyone was watching us and whether they thought we looked ridiculous.

After those moves, he began with another set. This time he pulled me closer and our bodies touched..

I'm going to interrupt the narrative by saying I'm literally smiling like an idiot as I'm typing this right now and replaying the image in my head. He was so beautiful. Hahaha. It reminds me of Gabriella and Troy from "High School Musical" when they danced on the rooftop garden while singing the song: "Can I Have This Dance." That scene is really romantic and I kept laughing and smiling while my date was effectively making me fall in love with him.

I should've ended things with that magical moment, right? I should've just gone home straight after. But no. I had such a great time with him that I didn't want to end the night yet. So we went to his hostel and I ended up fucking a Russian, Greek, Italian and Spanish. Yes, I was gangbanged because I'm a slut like that.

Just kidding. They're just one person. It was all him. For that, let's call him "Four". Four origins. Haha. It somehow flattered me that among all the women he met in my country, I was the only girl whom he took to his hostel and slept with. Not that he went out with a lot of women in the short span of time he's been here but according to him, he met one girl from the capital city and another one from here in mine—both through Bumble and he said that he was disappointed they looked different in real life.

My ears immediately perked up with this and if you've read my previous entries, you'd know why.

"We just had coffee and…" In his eyes, I saw he was recollecting a memory and then he made a hissing sound from his mouth that displayed an emotion of disgust accompanied by a little shudder. "Blah. I wasn't interested. And one girl said she would come over if I pay for the taxi and…" He shook his head in obvious disapproval and rolled his eyes at this. "I don't like that. It's like prostitution."

Hold on… He paid for that drink that gave me diarrhea… Was it the same thing? By the way, I literally had to poop in a public toilet for that and I'm never comfortable pooping in a public toilet.

"Omg. Am I not supposed to be here?" I asked because even though he invited me to come over and hangout at his building's rooftop when we were still chatting on Telegram, he might have changed his mind when he saw me in person and I literally invited myself in just before we took a cab. I had told him, 'Do you want me to come with you?' And then he looked at me and said, 'If it's okay with you.'

What if he just felt forced out of politeness or not to hurt my feelings? What if he just didn't have enough time to think because his cab was waiting right in front of us?

"What do you mean not supposed to be here?" he asked, looking down at me in confused amusement. I was lying on the bed and he was sitting next to me. This was before dirty things started happening.

Well, thinking about it now, he was really sweet to me in the cab... Because of the uncomfortable disturbance in my stomach, I felt warm all over and was sweating and he made me lie on his lap. 'Do you know why you feel hot?' he had asked in my ear. I thought he was going to say because I was wearing a sweatshirt but when I asked why, his reply was: 'Because I'm here.' Okay, that was actually so cliché but it still made me vibrate with laughter. Maybe because it was also true. He was hot. Haha. And then he laughed and the mood was just nice.

Back to his room.

"I mean, I practically invited myself in. Perhaps I'm being intrusive… Do you think I even look the same in my picture?" I demanded.

He stared at me, only blinking once. "Yes, you do. Very." Fuck those brown eyes.

"Oh, please. You're only saying that to be nice!" (Lmfao. As you can see, Erwin really did some damage to me.)

Four regarded me with an incredulous look. "No. I want you to be here. Why are you being crazy?" He chuckled and then it was at this instant he leaned down and kissed me to prove his point. I kissed him back and it wasn't long before I felt his tongue seeking entrance into my mouth. I let him in and collided my own tongue with his.

What he said made me somewhat glad because that meant my new picture worked. He said he thought my face was perfect and that it was his type, and that I looked better than 99% of the women he sees in the streets. Haha. What a flatterer. Don't believe him. Of course, he could be lying about not sleeping with the girls he mentioned, but the way he expressed his slight disgust and disinterest towards his previous dates somehow appeared very convincing.

He whispered some Italian poem in my ear and it really made me giggle because it sounded so sexy and beautiful even when I didn't understand anything. Lmfao. I also, also… really liked looking at his body when he'd stand naked. He's not ripped nor is he so muscular but he's lean and fit and has a swimmer's body. He is absolutely my type in the looks department.

Anyway, you'd think he'd be as romantic in bed as we he was during the date but what he did to me was probably the most explicit intimacy I've ever experienced in my entire sex life. Just absolutely nasty. I don't even want to get into the details because though wild and crazy my sexual thoughts can get, what we did wasn't at all in any of my fantasies. He's genuinely kind and sweet and every bit a gentleman; we cuddled, held hands, and when I had to go home, he accompanied me outside the hostel and saw to it that I had taken a cab. But when it comes to sex, he suddenly becomes an animal. His soft and thoughtful gaze... it changes into that of a beast. I kind of only enjoyed it at first but when we did it again, it made me think of Erwin and how much I preferred his tenderness. I know I said he didn't have the fire I needed but with him, sex was "making love". There were a lot of kisses and he was gentle and passionate and while he was inside me, he'd bend down to collide his mouth with mine and I'm telling you, I'm a sucker for "kissing while fucking". Whereas with Four... Well. He certainly does have a "fire", alright. However, his fire burns in a way that doesn't appeal to me at all. I could only smile like this 🙃 I don't even know what this smile means but yeah 🙃

Is it always gonna be like this? I go out with other men and in the end, realise I prefer Erwin? The man was supposed to be just a subject of practice in the first place... Jeez, the irony of the events now since the trial-and-error has basically become somewhat my "main". I still don't like him that much, though. And I'm not sure if I can see myself falling in love with him but hey, it worked with Patch before so who knows.

Ahh. Idk, really. I have a feeling we're going to end soon.

Speaking of him, I somehow feel bad about what I did. Just before I headed out to meet Four, he asked me what I was doing and I told him I was going out in a bit to meet my friend.

Him: Hi, sweetheart. I just got off from work.

Me: Yay. Did you have fun? Hahaha.

Him: Uhmmm… It was OK, haha. How about you? What are you doing now?

Me: I think I'm going out in a bit.

Him: Where?

Me: To your heart.

Him: Hahaha.

Me: I'll be whoring around, babe. Wanna come?

Him: Only if I'm the one you'll be whoring around with. Hehe.

Me: Hahaha. I'm meeting up with a friend. Gotta go now. Kisses 😘

Him: Alright, enjoy.

He probably thought the friend I meant was Cara Dean. Now we still haven't talked about our relationship but I think I'm already in some kind of one with him? I don't know but we never really stopped acting like we're lovers. And although he implies I'm the only girl he's seeing, who knows, really? Yeah, we flirt and we call each other endearments but I'm not sure if we're exclusive. However, I'm certain that if he found out about me fucking another man, he wouldn't want me anymore.

Four even saw his message popping up asking me how my time went with "my friend" when the foreign prince went through my phone to see the apps I have (with my consent, of course). He even read the text out loud but Erwin wrote it in our native tongue so Four didn't understand anything. When asked what it meant, I gave the translation and I don't think he put so much thought into it nor did he mind who the sender was.

Sigh. I'll stop entertaining other men for now until I get my period. It was supposed to have arrived three days ago according to my tracker but it's almost never really accurate. God. I hope I get it soon. The pros and cons of having an active sex life hangs in an unfair balance of a risky gamble. In a way, I somewhat miss my pathetic, lonely and uneventful life.

But you know what? Despite the disappointment I had with Four, I really enjoyed most of my time with him. Maybe because he's so exotic and humble and charming and he didn't make me feel shy. His company was just really light-hearted and comfortable. No awkward silence at all. I only have one complaint but overall, he has a very likable personality and character. Although when I was in the cab on my way home around 1am, I suddenly felt empty. So I messaged Chace and told him about my night. I knew it was the meaningless sex and how I felt like a tramp. The feeling stretched on for some time but after about three hours, I was okay again. Perhaps it wouldn't have been so terrible had I only been in perfect condition. Because of my stomach, I held myself back in matching his wild passions. To be honest, he wanted to fuck me from behind and I legit replied with: "No, I have diarrhea, remember?" Yes, I was that comfortable with him that saying that didn't make me feel awkward at all. And when I think of the dance we had, it makes me genuinely smile and not in this "🙃" way but in this: ☺️.

The night before that, there was a song I randomly stumbled upon on YouTube that I immediately liked but I didn't know what the title was because it wasn't written anywhere. Plus it was in Spanish and though I could understand some parts of the lyrics, I needed more accuracy of one or two lines to find it on Google. Four was an absolute help with it. We listened to the song together on the bed and his face immediately broke into laughter because the song was so romantic. It's an old song. When he found it, it turns out he knows of the singer. The song is called "Tal Vez Es Amor" by Chayanne and now when I listen to it, what plays in my head is our moment together dancing under the stars on top of the biggest mall in the city, overlooking the bridge, the city lights, and the ocean that make the whole setting very romantic.

That truly was the best.

Thanks for that wonderful Thursday night, you adorable beastly foreign prince ❤

Friedchimken's Dear Diary