Dear Diary, I feel stupid.
Actually
I am stupid
The thoughts in my head are a complete chaos. It's hard for me to think about one thing. I've always been amazed at how people in movies think "concretely" and in words. It's not like I don't have words in my head. My head sounds like a broken radio.
Sometimes I feel like an aquarium fish. This state is even hard to explain. It's as if I perceive everything through a filter with interference. As if all the feelings I have have never been described in words. It's like all the times I tried to do it, I had to cut some kind of shape out of them.
My train of thought sounds like school. Someone is trying to talk about a specific topic. Other people are talking in the background on completely different topics, which prevents the person from speaking. Younger kids constantly shout out memes and jokes from TikTok. In the next room, in the assembly hall, teenagers have set up a disco and are constantly playing some kind of music. Sometimes too loud. Teachers tell children what they should to do, but these instructions cannot be heard in the noise of the crowd. And on top of the overall picture, images from an old projector are superimposed, which has gotten a little stuck and is showing a gallery of everyone present and not only them. All this is observed by a not very intelligent child who cannot extract any pattern from what is happening, although sometimes he succeeds. This child has terrible vision problems similar to the noise of an old TV.
I really feel stupid. I'm so fucking limited. It feels like everyone is more aware than me. My head is filled with nothing. My brain is scrambled
I can't even begin to remember how many things I thought about while writing this
A description of the only fleeting thought I remembered: I thought about Master Wu and how cool all the wise old men have nice voice acting in my native language. Of course, this thought was accompanied by visual and audio accompaniment.
Damnit tautology. I have a very limited English vocabulary