October 23, 2025 #520

Dear Diary, so I decided to take a month of leave from work. 

I’ve been struggling with fatigue… at least since last year. I’ve been thinking it’s just fatigue everyone else struggles and I need to fake it out it’s nothing like everyone else does. 

But it’s getting harder. I have to admit that I often gave up basic hygiene like taking bath and brushing teeth at night this summer. (Who would be close enough to smell my body at work!) and since last year my morning routine is done in 20 min no make up, hair just brushed off and tied up, no care for cow licks. Quality of my daily life has been sacrificed for just not being absent from work. I would felt it’s worth it if my work days were productive enough. But it’s getting messier every week and I often take breaks in bathroom stalls. I often have on idea what I should do or how I should get things done. It made me feel shitty. My weekends? Just sleep through till the end. 

So that’s why I asked for a month of leave. I was on the edge not only physically but emotionally. 

I thought I can start use my days for cleaning and tidying up my room, taking bath, do some slow exercise, waking up at proper morning time and eat meals at proper times etc… to help me to get back into healthy life again but I was still in bed all day today. 

But the good news is that i went to an endocrinologist and i showed my blood test results from last year and he immediately said i must have fatigue issues. I am waiting for the latest and detailed results of blood tests now.