Dear Diary,
Hi, yesterday I said I won't write anymore but if I don't right at present...I will get mad...dimag ki watt lag jayegi... aise bhi mind and heart k bich me lagi padi hai...what should I follow...
I woke up with that irritating sound coming from the adjacent flat... some work is going on there...and I am so frustrated with that.
And I opened Instagram, there is some person I am following from a long time and he was in a live in relationship and I saw his engagement videos on his Ig story and it was too adorable...I never found his girl that much beautiful but today she looked just wow and beautiful, and reactions and expression said it all...the way she looked at him after he made her wear the ring...that yaa...she got lucky and boy even didn't noticed and was looking somewhere else on the camera, it showed how much this thing meant for her and he made it for her... felt so adorable but also Envy everyone around me...why I missing this in my life... such moments...
Then, I realised today is Saraswati Pooja...so I thought of going to the temple, I feel that from a long time, I am living very disoriented... puja path hi karna band kr di hu...ghar me bhi bahut din tak puja nahi krti hu... ye sab negatively affect kr raha hai life ko...but me being me...lazy...but I got up little late and took a proper shower and prayed at home...aaj bhi bhagwan ji se kuch nahi maanga hai...kuch maangi thi kuch time pehle...dikhte hain pura hota hai ya nahi...
Then, I checked my phone and saw 6 missed calls from Divya, I called her back and now I will be going for her shopping...I am so not in this mood but I said okay, shopping is so tiring process...
I will get ready now so that by the time she reach here, I am ready and ghar bhi thodha arranged lage...and fir I will go to some temple...I need some positive and spiritual vibes in my life... I want to go to ISKCON also but not today...I don't want to spend alot of money on cab as it is too far...
I thought of having a counselling session not only me...but for both of us...
People are there wanting to talk to me but I am avoiding it but for how long...but what I know right now I am not in correct mindset... maybe I am waiting for him or waiting for some miracle to happen...
I am hungry as well but right now I have no time for cooking...I have washed my hair so now I need to fix it, get ready and arrange my home...
I thought of cooking a certain breakfast but it's too late, maybe tomorrow or for dinner I will have it...
Okay got to go...
I wish I could upload some pictures here like old times...