December 10, 2023
She will show me her lightness, the ways in which she moves, like she's alive.
Lovely girl, cover me with your wings, show me the world you are so unafraid of.
When I crumble under the weight of my own heart, she will reach her hand to me, tilt my head up, swallow my shame with a kiss.
She will take my hand and lead me through the city, dancing on the fountain steps. Within a sea of voices all I can hear is her shoes on the stone pavement, I can only see her clear eyes, only taste her vanilla perfume in my mouth when I swallow, I can only feel her soft arm on my flesh.
She will lie with me in the grass, allow me to breath, tell me it's okay, I can just be for a bit.
We'll walk together in the night, and as she moves beside me, how could I be scared of the dark? Of the shadows of atrocious men hiding behind every bus stop, of the monsters peeking through windows, of the lions roaring in my head? How could I be scared when her hand in mine keeps my feet from leaving the ground? Like a floating balloon, I follow.
I'll sleep well with her legs on my wrecked body, once in a while the confidence with which she says no will bring me to my knees. And on my knees I'll stay, until my prayer brings her to my aid again.
In my pain she will only see my love, in my hate she will only see my desperation, and in my rotting body she will plant cornflowers and yellow roses.
L
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