September 03, 2023


Dear ghost,

There is a rash in my heart that obstructs my flight. I was sitting at the back of the class once, pretending as if I didn't care while carefully listening to all that was said and done. I was one of the best student. It started when I was in class eleven. I kept on slipping and losing what I was known for. So I secretly looked for those grades again and again. When I knew where I stood, it broke me. More than that, it broke them. They had so many dreams for me. They wanted so much more than I offered so it planted these rash in me. Now I have a rash in my heart, it itches in all fathomable scene. No matter how content my situation, I always compare. No matter how fun the business,  I look at all those above me. The only fault lies in my eyes. 

Gouge them out off my wretched socket, let me just live my life, the way I want them. Why do you make me think about others grades? Why am I being graded? Why do I have to be better than them?? Why why WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY?