November 08, 2022: I'm getting a little impatient.

 

I've asked Panda about our date twice last week. And it's supposed to be tomorrow. And he hasn't said anything yet. 

He sent me a video of his college dance society practising, and that was it. 


Radio silence ever since. 


God, what has become of me😭😭

I check my phone for every buzz and every call. I dreamt about the date before it happened👍. I've been studying all day today so I can go tomorrow with a relaxed mind. Now I'm wondering if I've just made it all up in my head. Is this even happening or is my mind simply blowing happy bubbles of delusion?


I'm NOT going to ask him about tomorrow.

That would mean pouring my self-integrity down the drain.

He doesn't get to do stuff at his convenience.


THIS is why I don't do this shit. I hate not being in a position of power and I know I can't and these two contradicting emotions are constantly at war in my head.


He's going to say no or just delay it or forget we ever talked about this, isn't he :)


I think I'll just shut up, take a shower and study for another few hours and forget this ever happened.



Loading...
Comments