[ENTRY 91..✍️]
Hang Four. He stirs my feelings. I'm already doing so fine with Erwin that I even thought of focusing on him already and putting an end to my exploration for more options and then the foreign prince just out of nowhere sends me a bundle of his latest travel pictures asking my opinion which one is the sexiest. The best I chose from his recent selection is him at the beach standing like the tall and delicious snack that he is, in black shorts and a pink shirt, unbuttoned, revealing the fine curves and shadows of his toned abs and defined chest that only give me flashbacks of the night I ran my tongue on them, and now the desire to do it again. He is
so hot. I still vividly remember the image of him standing in the bathroom casually naked, washing himself and looking at me with those big, brown eyes of his, completely unaware of the perfection he was creating from that simple posture alone and that goddamn modest smile that makes me forget about the hidden beast underneath that charming and rugged handsomeness he carries. Even my girlfriends got ecstatic when I showed them his pictures. Tsk. I should've just said yes when he invited me to go with him to one of the best beaches here. I could only imagine the kind of fun we would've been having. But I didn't want to go alone so I invited Cara Dean with me. But the bitch had other plans that weekend.
"Yeah, damn it. I should've canceled those plans.." she regretfully stated after seeing his photographs.
"What were those plans, anyway?"
"Sleeping."
A moment of silence. "Fuck you."
Gah, I just miss Four's foreign mannerisms. His hybrid accent. The way he'd roll his eyes. How he gets excited when his playlist starts a new song and he goes all: "Oh, I love this one! Listen." How he sings along to his favourite lines. How he translates them for me. How he tells me the adventures he had from different cities all over the world whilst my head lays on his bare chest and our hands entangled... He's still in my country but still relatively far (a plane ride away), enjoying his holidays soaking under the sun in one of the most popular tourist destinations of our motherland.
Him: Let me see you.
Me: You've already seen me.
Him: To refresh my memory.
Me: Aww, is the foreign prince lonely?
Him: Very lonely.
Me: Didn't you find a chic there to not make you lonely.
Him: I did (the ones who take his pictures) but not interested.
Me: Why not.
Him: Not sexy as you. I prefer you.
Me: Lmfao. Why do you always pick girls you aren't interested in, anyway.
Him: Filters. Too many girls use them here.
Me: If the face seems too unrealistically smooth like there's no texture at all, don't swipe right. Don't you at least enjoy their company?
[Reference…]
Me: You didn't get disappointed I look so different from my pictures? 😂
Erwin: Haha yeah, it does look different but it's okay, I enjoyed your company, anyway.
[End of flashback…]
Me: Don't you at least enjoy their company?
Him: Yeah, all very friendly. They even buy me food and drinks. Super nice.
Me: Ooh, good for you 😂 And that's still not enough to get you to bed?
Him: Haha, yeah. Maybe spaghetti truffate will get me to bed. Lol. I love them so much. If I come back to your city, I'll cook it for you.
Me: Aww ❤ If you're interested in someone from Bumble, show me the pic so I can tell you if it's edited or not 🙂 Regular filters are fine, I guess, but overdone facial alterations.. that's a whole nother level of catfishing.
Him: Okay. Hehe.
Seriously, is he that unlucky to always land on women who look drastically different in real life? Thank God most men don't wear makeup nor use too many filters, then... Although the power of angle and lighting can still make a massive difference so they're still equally capable of tricking someone they look a certain way. Had those girls posted untouched (or even just slightly modified) pictures of themselves instead, perhaps Four would've still swiped them right. But now that they've exposed an.. I don't know, a "super enhanced" version of themselves out there (probably), they've set an expectation the guy was thrilled to meet and when reality shows up in front of his face, instead of noticing the natural beauty before him, his first impression is disappointment. And you know what they say: "first impressions last."
So what the fuck is WRONG with Erwin?
He got disappointed I look different in real life but decided I was tolerable?
I wonder if he finds me pretty at all…
He never gave me such compliments. He just says I'm cute but I know he's only referring to my size. Tss. Or perhaps I just really have some kind of irresistible charm in me… Haha. Dream on, bitch.
But how else would I explain it? In a school setting, guys like him date the prettiest and most popular girls on the campus. Now I might have had my fair share of experience in being a queen bee but that was when I was still a child. When I reached high school and college, I refused to have any spotlight on me. I faded into the background among the homely and invisible.
Don't even get me started with the adult setting. In this world, men like him date beautiful, independent and successful women. For fuck's sake, compared to that, I'm a fucking child. It suddenly reminds me of those K-dramas where the hero is this mature, successful and serious type of intimidating man (usually a boss) and then he meets this crazy, quirky girl who talks to herself in public, who always needs saving and is obnoxiously clumsy. (I am far from that, by the way. I mean, oh gosh.. I sure hope so! I haven't watched a lot of K-dramas but from the ones I've seen on TV, the main girls usually seem like that and I find it quite annoying.) I truly hope my personality is just pretty normal, though, but it just reminds me of that pairing mainly because Erwin is quite an intimidating man himself, especially when he's not talking, and most of all, he also looks like an oppa, so…
An intimidating handsome man dating a… Well, me. A childish person. Am I living in some kind of K-drama afterall?
Haha.
Anyway, I think we'll be seeing each other tonight. And I also know I said Four and I are unlikely to meet again but I'm now actually hoping I'd see him one last time. No crazy sex this time. Just… say, a good time in an ice skating rink. And a kiss ❤
Lmao. Who am I kidding. I wanna lick those abs.
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