July 27, 2021


Dear Diary,

A couple days ago one of my gf's co-workers gave her one of their old phones to use since hers got permanently taken. I'm super glad she did, was very nice of her. She told me that her friend was worried about her and I replied with "we all are". We all recognize that she's in an abusive home but she's the only one that doesn't think it to be that big a deal because she's been living that reality for so long and I guess built a tolerance for it.

She was adopted by her grandparents so its not like she's been separated from her entirely family. They all know what she's going through, they all talk about it behind her "moms" back and sometimes one on one chat with her about what's going on in the house. They just say "Oh I get it", "Now that's not okay because it's actually degrading", etc... They all know the pain she's in yet they never got her out of there and I'll never forget, and I'll always resent them for it. 

During the few times I had been to family gatherings and such, I've always thought about going off on all of them and making quite the scene when I do. As much as I wanted to, I never legitimately considered it. It wouldn't get us anywhere and it'd only make her parents hate me more. Its so fucking triggering when they'll act like family is such a big deal to them and then they leave their cousin, their niece, their direct fucking relative that they saw grow up in the home with that wicked witch. 

I will never forgive them for it and someday I'll tell them why I won't go to family gatherings, or their funerals, why I glare at them when they make eye contact, and why I looked pissed off around them. I see them as scum of the earth and nothing more. 
If it was up to me, I'd never look at them again. I'll show up to 1 thing to show off that I pulled through, that I'm the one that saved her from those monsters and wish them all a "fuck you" on the way out the door to never be seen by them again. 
I don't want them out our wedding, our funerals, birthdays, I just want them completely out of our lives because they don't deserve to be a part of it.