July 05, 2021

 

Dear Diary, the last few days I didn't do much other than usual housechores. A section of the house is being renovated, so it's constant cleaning, dust and dirt from renovation is no joke. I only need the major work done, the finishing is not that important, I can do it with his help and we can borrow tools if we don't have proper ones. It was used mainly for storage, but after renovation it can serve other purposes as well. 

I can't help but feeling nostalgic. For a good 5-7 years of my life, that particular section of the house was my workspace, my dreams and sorrows. About 6 years ago, I gave it up due to many reasons mainly money and health. Shortly after, I made a life-altering decision that has tremendous positive impact on my life, every aspect of it. Now after so long abandoned, turned into storage, that section of the house is finally undergoing much needed change as well. In a way I am grateful that although a creature of habit, I can stubbornly cling to the past and don't usually venture to unfamiliar territory, yet I am still able to recognize it when change is due and I can let go of things that don't work and no longer have positive impact on my life. To say it's difficult is an understatement, but I don't want life to be stagnant anyway - it's supposed to move forward, not stale.

Strangely, a lot of dramatic changes in my life occur every 6 years or so. I know that it's nothing to do with numbers, it's just the journey that my soul is on. Still it makes me wonder why 6 or so, not 10 or 20? But come to think of it, I can't imagine dramatic change every 10 or 20 years. Knowing myself, it would've been harder to accept that change is due after a decade, much less two decades. Nah, I'm fine with 6 or so, I'm used to that by now.

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