Dear Diary, there is something draining about romance, love, relationship. I don't have the energy for it anymore. I used so much in my healing journey, took me years to get to where I am now and whatever energy is left, I need it to maintain my current state. Not that I'm lazy, I don't want to make the effort. I'm just tired. I don't know what to do, I don't have the confidence and overall I just can't afford the risk. I am not a carefree spirit like some people, I have to always consider risk, consequences. Maybe that makes me a coward, always fearful of something different or new. Maybe that makes me boring, even selfish. That's fine, think what you want. I am comfortable where I am now, I don't want to lose that.