May 21, 2021 #Make-up

Dear soul, 

People think that I got over it pretty soon or easily. What they don't know is, that's what I want them to know. That's how I wanna display myself. Not that I'm putting on a mask for others. It's like a make up but done internally to my heart and mind. Asking them not to think much about it and doing all sorts of things to keep my mind and heart busy. Can not block the memories and heart ache that comes with it but I can try my best to not think about it often.  

They seem to go on this way with less occurrences of those memories. I know it will not go away completely and I can not let them go as well. For those memories are inscribed in mind and tattooed on heart. I cannot keep wallowing in it, for it will break me to a point where I'll not be able to function properly.  

So, I like this internal make-up. It has stopped the bleeding though but the wound is still there. So fresh and sensitive. It could bleed anytime if I put too much pressure on it. It would also not get healed completely, ever. I gotta live with this wound for years to come.