March 04, 2021
Received the text confirmation for my dads' doctors appointment. It's set for tommorow and I don't have to take my dad with me, just the medical/laboratory results, is what the secretary said... Which is absolutely fine. The last time I took my dad outside, he ended up with a cough after four or five days... We thought he had contracted COVID.
The day has been okay and I've been able to practice some mindfulness exercises for two straight days now. I've practiced it so many times before but now its time for a #30daychallenge
From what I have read before, and from what I have experienced, the halucinations are at their worst when you are alone. It's like your subconscious goes "Is he alone right now? Yes? Good! RELEASE THE KRACKEN!!!"
So I am actually quite glad I had learned mindfulness meditation after I got diagnosed and medicated. It would be impossible to learn the techniques in the midst of an episode, and now the usefulness of mindfulness techniques for my daily life is just something I wished I had learned sooner ...
"You are not your thoughts, feelings and opinions."
"They can change and pass by"
Same goes for the halucinations... I've stopped attributing or thinking about their meanings or purpose and whatnot... I can still hear some of them sometimes... But they are now indistinct murmurs that don't affect me as much as they used to... Because of the medicine or the mindfulness? I dunno... Probably a combination of the two.
It's almost dinner time and I have to go. Will write again soon.
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