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I dont like thinking about this diary, because its a house for negativity. Within this journal is the history of the worst part of my life so far. but I cant bring myself to get rid of it. Deep down theres a part of me that still suffers, and relies on this book to ease some of the pain, and theres also a part that wants to remember all of my troubles. I think its good to remember, thats what makes me stronger and keep fighting. I think Im much better now, and even though I hate this book, Im going to keep it. Sometimes I wish that I had more to write in it, and that scares me. How I want to feel that same hardship once again. Maybe Im depressed, and really good at hiding it, including from myself. Who knows how many things Ive convinced myself, knowing deep down it isnt how I really feel.
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It feels good to write in here again.