Dear Diary,
I dont know how to sort my thoughts. I've not been writing them out lately, which is definitely making it worse. I wouldn't even care if she walked away at this point, which is hard to say. It's always like she wants more than im comfortable giving. She asks for honesty and openness. But doesn't do it herself. She seems like she's looking for a way out, and would rather put them blame on me or us than to admit she wants to leave. I won't do take the blame. And maybe im creating scenarios in my head, but I feel somethings off and she won't say it. How can I let someone in I dont trust to be honest and open? How do I make sense of that. She wouldn't trust me if I wasn't. Why do I try to find excuses for others behaviors instead of accepting it when they show me who they are.