Dear Diary,
Today was one of the better days. Thank goodness for weekends. I got to have some snuggle time with my husband. I got more sleep today then I have had all week.
Is it possible for your body or subconsciousness to remember anniversary dates, even though you don't consciously? When you have too many you don't really remember them, or what order they were. Loss, trauma, pain... these are the best days of my life, why does my past plague me to much? I am in a safe place with someone who loves me and mostly financially stable... why can I not just simply enjoy it. I try to, I want to, but when it's quiet everything else seems to just boil up.
I got an email from one of my stalkers, that I thought had finally disappeared. He always changes emails and things, and he always seems to pop up... why? No matter what state I move to... How many times to you have to tell someone: no, go away, I want nothing to do with you? I put another block on his new information, again, I am just starting to wonder if he is going to start showing up at my new house now. Cause that's really my favorite thing...to start looking over my shoulder again...
I just want to be happy, I just want to be healthy. I try to be outwardly happy, and always tell people what I am grateful for, and try to go little nice things for others. I have some friends that have recently tested positive for the covids, I am afraid for them and their families. I sent them some little goodies and treats like edible arrangements, and dried fruits. I considered it my virtual hug to them. I try to brighten their spirits. I hope they recover well.
I am still waiting on my test results to come back from my last doctors appointment. I hope that the new meds for my kidneys are going to work out well. I hope there's proof of improvement, but waiting sucks.
Why can't life just be simple...