September 21, 2019

I'm dying inside and nobody knows it but me

I've made alotof fuckedup. mistakes n my life...  many careless choices...  any selfish choices and I've lived with them...  I've used them to make me stronger.  but somewhere along the road I got lost.  and I started making decisions that i've had a very hard time living with. Even more so recently since I've gotten sober... I've been a mom since I was 19 years old...  yes it's my fault.  I choose drugs over them.  I couldn't get clean or stay clean for them.  I waited to late to even begin to fix my wrong. and I'm still nowhere near ready to be a mom.  and it's my fault. I just hope one day they can forgive me. and that I can show them how far I've come an that despite my selfish inconsiderate fuckup they will see that I used it to make me stronger.