June 04, 2019

Dear Diary, tonight is sad. Just plain sadness. I am truly aware where this came from but I know I shouldn't feel sad about it. I did the right thing. I know I did the right thing. This is for the best. I just saved myself from a lifetime regret and pain— I truly hope so. It started wrong so it needs to end soon. I shut him off and told him to stop messing with me. It was the only right decision. I know he is kind and sweet, but I only think we were onlt better off as friends. He is really attractive and gentle but there's this ache in my heart that tells me it isn't right. He is a very likeable person. If I convinced myself that I like him, then I can truly tell that I like him but I dont want that. Not anymore. There's a lot more things that I wanted to do and I don't see myself with him but why do I feel like I miss him. I am at the depression stage. I hope he leaves my head immediately and I will treasure that one enchanting night with him. But I know he will disappear, like a mid-summer dream- it was a great dream. He will disappear in my thoughts, but he will always be remembered as something blurry and vague and fainted, a distant memory. And as I recall it, it will always put a smile on my face. 

That would be all, my Dear Diary. I've been keeping this feeling for days. I also hope to get over it soon.