ItsmeC's Dear Diary

------ wants a platonic romantic relationship with someone. Platonic cuddles and playing with hair, just as bros tho. Im totally up for that, but I dont know if I can give them that because Im pretty sure its something Ive barred myself from. In the

I could literally scream right now. I want to. Its crawling inside me. I have no motivations. No hope right now. I wish I could drop out of school, stop eating, maybe just disappear. I know it wont fix anything though. I want to talk about what I wri

Me corte hoy. 10:15 pm el mulso, hombro, y cadera izquierda. No sabe exactamente por que, pero lo hice. Creo que soy adicto. Quiero sentir la sensacion una vez mas. Soy enferma. I wonder why humans were created. My wording of that makes me wonder

Ive been thinking of cutting recently and I dont know why. It just feels like something I should try again, without knowing the reason. I think that deep down in my brain, there is definitely something wrong with me, and Im in denial which is why I c

I dont like thinking about this diary, because its a house for negativity. Within this journal is the history of the worst part of my life so far. but I cant bring myself to get rid of it. Deep down theres a part of me that still suffers, and relies

Before you read: recently I've gotten really into the topic of reality shifting, you might have seen it on tik tok, but there's a lot more to learn about it on other platforms like amino and youtube and I recommend you look into it because it really

I know im late to writing this but who cares. On 3/20/20 i felt like shit. It was around 4 am when i wrote the entry, and after completing it I contacted the crisis hotline. In the middle of that conversation I ended up texting ---- and I told her po

We all do different things at night. Some sleep, others play games, do homework, whatever. Some people do other things, some people think about death, and how they dont know why theyre feeling, and how much pain is going through them. At night, i oft

I feel like I'm going to explode. I literally cannot keep holding this in. I want to tear myself to shreds. I don't want to go to moms, the atmosphere there is sickly, and I've got about 15 different blades there. At my dads I don't have to worry abo

I've been doing better. Today I talked to ------ about alternatives and ways to cope with suicidal thoughts. We weren't talking about me though, we were talking about him. I didn't really know what to say at first, but I took the more caring and caut

It's not necessarily that I want to die. It's more of 'why should I stick around if I'm not needed?' I cant say its selfish either. I feel at peace with leaving. I've been reassured and know that my friends are fine without me. Why can't I leave if t

I think it's inevitable that I'm going to at least attempt suicide one day. Even if I don't want to, it's going to happen. Something will push me over the edge and I'll do it. I'll ignore the consequences and try to kill myself, and hey, maybe someon

on the 7th, a teacher asked me if I fought with my parents. She said she could tell because I always have a pleasant disposition at school. I guess someone finally noticed that I'm never sad at school. I can't be unless I try. I tried on the 6th and

I wonder what people think when they read these journals online. Maybe they see some selfish bitch who just wants attention. I started posting these so that I would feel a little less alone, so that maybe someone else would know what I'm going throug

I can feel the hole in me. It makes it hard to breathe. It hurts. I want to die. not literally. I want to feel. I don't know what I want. Whether its punishment or love. I just want this void to disappear. I always think that it wouldn't be so bad to

Dear Diary, here is a poem that i wrote recently... i did this for fun cuz well, thats how i get things off my chest 😊 Title: What Do I Do what do i do in this world full of humans and animals and insects  what do i do in a world full of t

hey, i dont know how this works but i wanted to try this out. its cloudy out and i dont feel like doing anything,  im gonna just take my heart of the table or now, people make me mad so i wonder if its me the problem but even if that were the cause

Dear Diary, I haven’t sleep that well last night and I woke up very late today. I do struggle with the energy levels, especially in the mornings. I need to do something about it ASAP. I am in the process of trying some holistic shit, and I will

Dear Diary. Good morning for the first time. I hope that we can be friends, and please treat me well, when I pour my heart and soul out onto this virtual paper. I am not good at writing. Probably I am making many mistakes, and my language isn’t the