February 19, 2026

Dear Diary, I have always loved babies. Like, what’s there not to love? They’re so cute, so fluffy, just so baby and adorable. I’ve always loved babies, and maybe I always will. They light up my mood instantly, and I love spending time with them.

But I have never wanted a baby of my own. At first, it was because of childbirth and labour. Then I saw someone very close to me have a baby, and I realised that the real struggle starts after the baby is born, because then you’re responsible for a life that has zero survival instinct. And even when they grow up, you still always worry about them.

Looking at the present scenario and how the world is going to evil, I don’t want to bring a life into this world. I’d rather adopt. I have thought about this, and I think if I ever become stable enough, I would rather adopt a child than bring one into this world, because I believe that every baby, even if they aren’t mine, deserves a happy, healthy childhood.

I understand and accept that problems are a part of life and we have to live with them. But I believe the only problems any baby should ever have are eating vegetables, doing homework, not being able to stay up past bedtime, or not being allowed to play. These are the only kinds of problems any baby deserves...nothing more than that. So I’d rather help a baby who is already in this world than bring a new one into it.

I’ve always loved babies, but I never thought of having one of my own. But today, I was taking a nap and I dreamt of a little boy. He was around three or four years old, maybe even two..somewhere in that range. And since then, I can’t stop thinking about him.

In my dream, he slept on my chest and called me “Mommy.” And I can’t stop thinking about it. I’ve seen videos of girls saying they dreamt of their babies and, after waking up, missed them. This has never happened to me before, but today I experienced it. Since then, I can’t stop thinking about that baby.

Every time I see a little kid, I feel an instinct...a maternal instinct in me. I want to protect that baby, take care of it. But this was different. I can’t explain it. I didn’t feel about that child the same way I feel about any other kid I see. It felt something very,very personal, VERY RAW!!

I don’t know what to think of this. Of course, I still don’t want to have a baby of my own, because I don’t want to bring a child into a life of misery. But someone once told me that you don’t realise how much happiness a baby brings into your life, how you would feel when they call you “Mom"....Maybe I felt that today.

It was my baby. I don’t know if this even makes sense, but that little boy I dreamt of today… felt like my baby.