Dear Soulmate,
I promise I’m yours.
Always and forever.
Through the good and the bad.
For worse or for better.
I wanna be with you for the rest of my days.
I promise I’ll love you.
Forever and ever and always.
My love, I couldn't help the tears from falling. My heart was suddenly siezed with nostalgia and sadness..
I was scrolling through Instagram and came across the same video that filled me with so much warmth and devotion over two years ago...
The guy said: "Send this to the person you love,” before singing the song. And so I sent it to him, because there was no one else, and the lines sang everything my heart felt and wanted, and I loved him with all my heart, and I thought… I thought he was you. I believed he was you.
But it was all in my head. I trusted my feelings over his actions... So I couldn’t see that I was wrong. That I had always won the war in the battle of who loved whom more.
The song that once made me feel with so much ardent, indescribable certainty and love, now made me feel so unwanted. Abandoned. Ugly. Undesirable.
But I wiped my tears away.. because I just unearthed the memories of the future I wanted with him that had long been burried.
Why couldn’t he be you? Why couldn’t he love me the way I want to be loved?
Who are you?
Do you even exist?