Dear Diary,
Hey, I am back here.
I went to watch Samay raina's comedy show today.
We went out yesterday night also.
Things haven't changed much from the last time i wrote.
But it feels less heavy now.
I watched a video on from National Geographic on a tour to Alaska today. And I saw those music videos with bakground scenaries of Italy.
There's still so much that I haven't seen yet. I looked at the videos from Ladakh, Pondicherry, Felt like I wanted to go see those places myself. I have some dreams now 😄😄
I'm also getting some time these days to think about Things apart from my job. Yesterday night, I looked for companies on LinkedIn isn't really helpful, but on the positive side, There was one company that wanted to know about one challenge i faced with the embedded programming, And it reminded me Of all the challenges I faced at Kiot, and I felt so good. Felt like I haven't wasted my years. There is so much that I have done, like really soooo many products and me writing those firmwares. 😄
It's so strange with my memory that for a very long time, maybe in the last two years, I never thought about all the things that I've done.These were not very easy things, these were some challenging things... I am capable, I think. What I need is a good mission, a good challenge...
I even messaged one guy on LinkedIn whom i don't know, seeking his guidance on how to learn autonomous flight systems and asking him to chat with me this week. I know he may or may not respond, but I really like that I was able to take that step coming out of my comfort zone and believe. And I think that's something which we need sometimes.
I spent some time on each of these, and after one day of spending time on these things, I find I'm not fully sold on any of these yet.And that's why I felt anxious. I also realized that difference in myself a few years ago and now is just that i am avoiding taking risk now. When i was easrning less, i had nothing to loose, i did not fear and i consistently tried to ensure that i dont earn more. So everything felt exciting, everything... Now i am weighing everything with what i have now... But i know now, that doing any startup would come down to this, my willingness to take risk. Period. I can start anything i want right now, i just have to sign up for the risk.
I'm still looking for my mission, It's not clear to me yet, but at the same time, I'm hopeful. I trust. I trust in my destiny. I'll find something I like. And if I don't, well, I'll look for it all my life, And that'll be an experience too.
Bdw, it's Something I cannot tell you in words, but I feel really good writing to you.
Love ❤️
Panda
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