Dear Diary,
Is this what depression really looks like? Quiet. Heavy. Lingering.
I don’t want to study. I don’t want to cook. I don’t want to be right now.
I stood in the kitchen at 11 p.m., cooking not out of joy just hunger. And even that felt like too much effort.
My heart aches. I miss my parents, my sister… I miss feeling okay.
There’s a swelling beneath my left eye or Maybe it’s from the crying. Or maybe it’s from the stress I’m holding inside.
What’s strange is that I’ve never felt like this before. Sure, I’ve had sad days — everyone does. And I’ve been feeling low before, but never for more than a day. This time, it’s two days straight. I’m crying for no clear reason.
Tomorrow is the last day of exams. I should be happy and relieved. But all I feel is this unbearable sadness pressing against my heart. I tried telling myself positive affirmations: “I’m happy today. I’m happy. I’m happy.” But all it did was delay the tears until later at night.
Even watching Hometown Cha Cha Cha didn’t help. Episode 14 just made me feel even more low.
And the worst part? I haven’t studied at all.
Not because I forgot. But because I couldn’t.
Because somewhere inside, I’m breaking internally.