May 18, 2025

      Those illnesses have opened my eyes to our vulnerability. But they also made me realize that I just don't have time to pretend. I need to live my life now. Not in the future. Not in the past. How much do I have left on this earth anyway? It is what I have. Not what we generally think happiness is. College life? High paying job? Relationship? Family? Those are great things, but they don't have to define happiness. 

      I want to be satisfied with the things that I have, and not be crushed by the things I have to go through. Oh how true the saying "Health is the crown that only the sick can see" is. I wish I didn't have to rely on meds for the rest of my life. But what can I do? This is not in my power.