#13 December 18, 2023

 

Dear Diary,


One is feeling like one desires to express oneself. One feels like one desires to express one's sexuality. One feels like one needs an illusion to feel one is connected to someone else. One wonders if one is alie. One hates the One who has limited one's desires. One hates the One who has asked oneself to hate oneself fo having desires and needs. One is constantly hating oneself. One is struggling to find a common ground. One is crying for a connection. One is crying for closeness. One wants to be intimate with someone one feel understood by. One has anger inside oneself. One is struggling with anger. One isn't able to differentiate between one's physical needs and one's psychological needs. Meri rooh tarap rahi ha apny rab sy milny ky liye, meri rooh jaanti ha apny rab ko. Meri rooh mere sy muhabbat krti ha. Meri rooh mere jism main majood ha, shukriya ada karti ha ky main usy pehchaan pai houn, ky main usy jaan pai houn, jaanti ha ky meri bhi zaroriaat hain, meri jismani or nafsiati zaroriaat ha, or mujhy puri permission day rahi ha ky main apni zaroriat ko pura karoun, sai tareeky say, vesa tareeka jo meri rooh ky khaliq kay qareen lay jata ho, meri rooh taras rahi ha apny khaliq sy milnay ky liye, meri rooh ro rahi ha apny khaliq sy milny ky liye, mera dimagh sawaal puchta ha meri rooh ky malik ky baray main, lekin meri rooh tu sab jaanti ha, meri rooh tu sab sach jaanti ha, meri rooh tu apny khaliq ko jaanti ha or pehchaanti ha, meri rooh muhabbat sy aashna ha, meri rooh us azeem rab ki banai hui azeem makhlooq ha, meri rooh apny rab ki aashiq ha, meri rooh apny khaliq ki aashiq ha kiun ky vo agar exist krti ha tu apny khaliq ki vaja sy karti ha, meri rooh bhot khoobsorat ha, meri rooh apny khaliq ki paband ha, meri rooh apny khaliq ki banai hui sab sy ala makhlooq ha, meri rooh main hi meri jaan basti ha, meri rooh main sab ki azaadi ha, meri rooh us sab roohon ki nighabana ha, meri rooh un sb ki roohon ki nighabana ha, meri rooh apny rab ki aashiq ha, main aik azeem insaan houn, jaisay har insaan azeem ha wesy hi main bhi azeem houn.

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