Dear Diary,
I don't know what to write. I am trying to make sense of my feelings and my thoughts. One is wanting validation from the illusions one created in one's own mind. Illusion of a teacher, illusion of a father, illusion of a mother, illusion of a lover, illusion of a stranger. One makes oneself feel like these illusions to be true, maybe because they exist in the physical world. One belongs to another world, where no validation is needed, where one doesn't even need one's own validation because one is validation oneself. One wants love in the physical world, one wants respect in the physical world, one wants connection in the physical world, one wants support in the physical world. One wants everything in the physical world and ends up suffering because nothing in the physical world belongs to oneself. One belongs to another world, where everything one needs flows to oneself without any restriction. One is loved unconditionally, one is supported uncontionally, one is accepted unconditionally. One is love, one is peace, one is happiness. One is experiencing anxiety because one is running after things which doesn't belong to oneself. One is running after things which give this illusion of love and acceptance to oneself making one feels like one needs it while one is love and acceptance oneself. How can one need anything which is one oneself. One wants knowledge, one wants to learn, how can one want knowledge when one is a source of knowledge oneself. One is connected to the source of knowlegde, knowledge flows when one allows oneself to connect to the source of knowledge. One is a being which is always learning, one stuggles because one doesn't allow oneself to accept whatever flows. One created resistance oneself while blaming everything in the physicaql world creating resistance. It's oneself creating resistance, one should stop creating resistance so one can start finding within. One is experiencing anxiety because one wants to control the unknown. How can one control the unknown while one's present state was unknown once as well. One is experiencing anxiety because one is always running after the unknown while not knowing unknown will always stay unknown, it will only nbe know when one will alwo oneself to experience it in this very moment. One experience anxiety because one is running after the illusion of the unknown one has created oneself. One will never know the unknown unless one allows oneself to make it known in this very moment one is experiencing right now. One must stop running after this illusion of the unknown if one wants to find peace and happiness. One's feelings are always accepted unconditionally. One's feelinsg are always loved unconditionally. One's feelings are valid. One's experiences are valid.