September 21, 2023

 

Dear ghost,

In this hour, so late at night yet so early in the morning, I am wide awake. I dread the dawn too much. Thus, wrapped in a darkness too light for me, I am utterly in awe of my anxiety. I am afraid I find only speck of joy in what i sweat. I apologize for I am overwhelmed by my indifference. I have lost my passion in the sea of the jungle.

 I am no adult. I see no adult among my circle. 

I am the one who drew the lines. I chose to be the loner admist the laughter. However, why am I so lonely? So in need of love that I can taste the bitter caramel of solitude. 

Then again, I only want to run in the woods. To find a cabin with a small bed and lots of book. In that woods lies my happiness. In that woods my loneliness is a honey of solitude. It is what I desperately desire. It is what I often dream of.


Yours even as I fear to be.

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