September 14, 2023


Dear Diary,

"Not Everything has to make sense, just let it go and Choose Peace."

Dear diary, hi, long time no see.

I wanted to write but didn't wrote anything, not many times, just once or twice.

But I am writing today coz I felt like writing. I am having severe headache right now, wasn't feeling that well since evening, my sleep wake up cycle is quite disturbed.

Anyways, Idk what to write, everything is fine, life is fine, don't have time to be sad or anything and when I have time, I spend time with my mobile, mostly scrolling Instagram or sometimes roaming around in the city, social life is still a zero, only meeting Aman and my house helps and the interns on daily basis, there are times when I don't even step out of my house for days, yup this kind of days are back in my life again. I even don't realise that it is raining outside or sometimes I don't eveb see how the day looked like, no sunrise, no sunset, I don't even step to my balcony which used to be my fav place back in the time. Day before Yesterday, I was little harsh with Khushi, she started crying and I felt bad but I didn't said sorry coz I wasn't sorry at all for it but I ordered some ice-cream for all of us to console her.

Life has changed but still it is similar.  Like still my parents are trying to fix me up with suitable guys, my WhatsApp chat with papa is still flooded with random pictures and biodata and I have several messages which I haven't even marked as seen till date. The fact is that I don't feel like talking to anyone, I am happy with myself, I am happy in my own space.

I don't want to marry anyone, why this society treats marriage as a necessity, marriage should be optional. I am not ready for marriage, I am not ready for sharing my life with someone.

Idk for how long but at this moment, I am avoiding all these. I guess I am so used to of living alone, their my emotions and cravings have been suppressed or whatever term suits well. And I am still obese. :)

Apart from this everything is fine. I felt little nostalgic few minutes back, as today I gave donation for Ganpati celebration in our society that reminded me of last year, how was my life then, yup that time I was ready to marriage, I remember how heart broken I was, I was vulnerable, I used to cry, how sad I was. And today, see I feel content within myself.

Last year, I was jobless, unable to figure out what do I like and what not, today life is different, I love what I am doing, I feel happy, I don't mind sacrificing my sleep and again spending my whole day infornt of my pc...I feel power and strength within myself, I feel confident.

Time flies and everything changes...this is life. ❤️

I am very grateful for everything to the almighty. 😊

😅 Too much of deep conversations, btw I am thinking of bringing of Ganpati ji at my home, I was quite excited for it but now I feel that I don't I should or not but most probably I will bring Ganesh ji at home, Ganesh ji aayenge aur dher saari khushiyan bhi aa jayengi... And yes aaj 2 enquiries aayi regarding building a central panel or something like that, I have no idea, I will have to figure it out, it will give more money, I hope I could learn and execute it.

Aur last itte dino me kya hua I don't remember properly to write here, nothing specific...

And yes we received an eChallan of 2k for driving on wrong side for 1 minute I guess and that too around 100-200m only. We went to nursery and car overpassed it so instead of reversing thr driver bhaiya just turned back on drove on wrong side, bad luck that day coz we had a small argument with that nursery guy also, plants kharidna pad gaya mehnga 😅 but I was too excited after knowing this afterall this was our first ever challan , no no second ever challan, last time I only paid 3k but first ever challan that went to my home address for violating rule here.

See you soon Dear Diary!

Until then, bye

I wasn't aware few days back that baklava is a Turkish dish, after eating I thought that it some Rajasthani sweet dish but after many days I realised that it is Turkish dish actually few days back.

And yes India is on Moon 🌝.

My first starbucks coffee and after that I declared that I make much much better coffee>>>>> at home.