Hola Diary,
Its quiet late in night and i should(Must) sleep, but i want to write to you before that.
Went with manan today, it's been so many days, since i am here and i never took him out, i was feeling so bad about it. But we went today, he ate painpuri of 30Rs 😀 and i bought him colorful sheets and Gel pens. I like it so much to just be with kids, and to see how they think. While he was walking fast in the traffic jumping over sidewalk, looking at him, i felt one can definitely make a movie on just the life of a boy this young. Specially on someone with his height, he would call out names other kids he know from school from far 😀 and tell me where can i go if i ever got lost in the city. Seriously, it was sooo wonderful just to walk with him.
In the day today, i was feeling a little low, a different kind of low, when you just feel like having tears right behind your eyes and you don't exactly have a reason, it's just, your heart feels a little heavy at times.
Its partly the work(Thinking about code and navid's comments, take soo much of my time) and partly her. She acts weird at times. Sometimes she is nice and caring, and then when i reciprocate the same, she starts becoming rude.
Yesterday when i called her to ask if she booked tickets on the weekend, she said, why am i bothered if she booked tickets. (I know she may be having some work pressure), It's just that, i would never talk to her rudely and sadly have the same expectation from her. While i know, i know, i have told myself this a 1000 times that i CANNOT have expectations from her or from anyone. That's what make my heart a little heavy everytime i have to remind this to myself.
Not that, having a heavy heart is bad. I am ok with it, but it just is today.
Also, i talked to JJ yesterday, i miss her at times.It doesnt hurt me that much when she talks rudely to me, i know thats how she talks. But she atletast knows what she is doing and she shows it when she cares and when she doesn’t. She didn’t make any promises she cannt keep. I think i was just going well….
Anyway, i am not sad. I have an upcoming trip and this would mark my 4th state. I’ll have fun.
I want to write a bit about mizo trip also, but maybe later.
Sayonara
😴😴