Hello Diary
Could not write to you on birthday but here we are on the new year.
The 2022
Year started with same high lows, challenges at kiot never eased out. I missed her a lot and she wasn't here. We hardly spoke over calls. It will be the year, i leave kiot on its own and test it.
(I forgot his name) left us suddenly, kind of cheating, kind of bad things at kiot as well. Not everyone can take challenges, most people want easy things.
We(Me & Dawrani) started Centen. Imported our first lot from china, it is kind of my first business (my own idea, my own business).
In march we(Me & Dawrani) go to Goa. It was a sudden plan, IT WAS GREAT. Just being in Arambol was amazing. We sat on the beach all day long and talked over stuff. I also told him, i wanted to propose her, and he said he kind of knows what'll happen but he wanted me to try and learn on my own 😁. It's also the time i figured out what i wanted to do after kiot. (Or so i thought)
Kiot moved to different office, for few days it was good with the peopltech office, i was no longer feeling like my salary being burden on kiot. And there was a new hope of making a new IOT Platform (Which we could never make).
Kiot has decided to back out from the peopltech funding amid concerns. But we are moving to an all new building. I wont have my seat there though. I'll never be moving to the new office. My time has come.
Soon, vishwa is going to leave too. He was good.
I went to Bangalore to meet Dawrani. Had our mysore trip (best place ever 😂😉)
I read Richard Feynman's biography, I got sooo inspired.
I kept missing her, she kept being insensitive(or so i felt), but i made more friends, i met more people, it kept me going. I met shikha (well, never met her, but we spoke over phone). I could relate a lot with her and i liked us sharing (mnostly our problems) with each other 😁.
Her wfh ends & Between Bangalore and Hyderabad, she decided to come to Hyderabad.
I felt like the spaces between us has grown and as years pass by we are growing a little apart.
But on her bday we went to the Kanha village, i did not give her any gift this year(I could not think of something great) and i never sent her the poem also.
I went to pondichery with sweety, shweta, kohinoor and jiju. I feel sooo sorry now for my behaviour, for being mad at sweety, kohinoor. 😩
By June, i was jobless (apart from centen). This was the time when i made an amazing new friend. I called chaitanya for the first time after college randomly and we talked and later started our satellite ground communication system project. (I feel sorry now, that i could not finish it, maybe i will). He became my very good friend, and i enjoyed having those long conversations with him.
I read about neauralink, approached companies in spacetech, neaural sciences also started learning quantum computing. I think i did not try hard enough and gave up too soon on my dream.
I gave in to the fear and a desire to travel the world with her (she probably never will). The idea of remote job, took over and i switched my focus (This feels like a mistake)... This time was very difficult indeed, i was confused, not getting inspiration, my mind was running to all the different things and i was changing goals every week. Not having a definitive work is BAD.
In August, we had THE TALK, and my heart sank Again. I felt lost, hopeless, lifeless. It felt very painful(I feel like pain is no word to describe how bad it felt). But i came out quickly this time.
I think August was really a very difficult month. I almost proposed Komal and the next day she got engaged with someone else. The hardships of August is also probably the reason i felt broken and applied for jobs.
It was totally luck, getting offer from canary. Despite all the negative feelings about it, i took up this.
Centen got too difficult too. It needed a lot of time and receiving very little help from dawrani made me little sad. We decided to shut the doors.
I went to vipassana in Dharmshala. I think, i realized that my life is more than just her. And for her, I wasn't even a good friend. I think i can move on to new things now.
I met JJ ❤️ and a new beautiful chapter started. I never thought i would be so comfortable, so like home with someone so soon. Cleo county felt like another home.
I learnt lot of important lessons with her. About people, relationships, romance.
Hugging her is the new levels of highs i have discovered this year.
For my bday i decided to be with her and it was one great bday.
I Learnt lessons at canary.
And now we are here.
And yeah, i got a new phone. & It is IPhone 😄
Books i read/listened
Richrd feynmam - you are surely joking
Six easy pieces
Kaizen
Ikigai
40 rules of love
Many more on blinkist
Now the best part - things i want to do this year
1. Learn Spanish until intermediate level 1 in Duolingo.
a. write two articles in spanish.
b. watch 6 movies in spanish
2. Travel
a. 6 different states
b. 2 different countries.
3. Vipasana 1 Hour atleast 3 days in a week.
4. Read 8 Books
a. Read 2 fictions, 2 biographies
5. Fitness
a. Habit of Jogging and excercise early morning 1 hour.
b. Gain muscles
6. Learn Quantum Computing - Maybe even work on projects
7. Make a full length application with NoCode Tools and one Solid backend application in Golang.
8. Develope a side hustle for passive income of atleast 1L per month.
9. Donate 60K(5k per month).
10.Track Time of everything.
11.Build a software engineering portfolio.
12. Write 6 public articles.
13. Learn to express myself more clearly by actively taking lessons, being more concious.
14. Speak less about myself, listen more.
15. Learn to be more positive.
16. One physically challenging travel plan. Get dawrani onboard too.
17. Make Tod a success. Spend 1L and create a sustainable model.
I am having a feeling, This year is going to be a good year…
Love ❤️
— panda —