Dear Diary,
Recap 2022,
Dear 2022, what an year you have been, just amazing, full of roller-coaster rides, you gave me heartbreaks, poor mental health, anxiety and everything but still you were amazing, as I became stronger enough to handle all of these and come out as a better individual. So, thank you for all the weird and amazing experiences. I have learnt of practice gratitude and try to keep positive approach instead of focusing on negative things, however, still I have to go long way to be so positive person, but I am trying hard, atleast I have stopped complaining.
This year I came across a lot of new people, conversed with them, although not physically but virtually. Few stayed as friends, few as acquaintances and others left, because of this, I learned to understand people with various personality traits, different perceptions.
This year I learnt many new things, I enrolled to various courses to finally figure out what do I really find interesting and can stick to for a long time. I upskilled myself to a bit this year and the process is still going on, I started earning my own money, although through freelancing, not sufficient money but atleast I started. I learnt driving this year which was a big achievement for me. I donated blood and saved lives as well, lol, I got planted few trees this year.
Some not so necessary but highlights and experiences of my 2022-
New year started with me cooking chicken Dum Biryani for the very first time.
January started with my parents convincing me to say yes for the treasure hunt through which they will find me a potential groom. Rest nothing interesting happened in January, life was good and peaceful.
February is called as the month of love, someone entered my life uninvited but turned out to be a beautiful person, life also seemed beautiful with his presence. I also joined a driving school in Feb.
Life was going good and smooth, everything felt beautiful, but March gave me a reality check, no matter what you want in your life, no matter how hard you try to get it, but life always have something different planned for you. March made me feel the fear of losing someone whom you want badly in your life.
April went cool and ended while giving me a heartbreak, I had never felt something like that before, I realized maybe I haven't had any real heartbreak till now, and it was true, literally nobody broke my heart before that and why anyone would do so after all I am too lovable. LOL
May being my birthday month failed to give me any kind of happiness, I used to be so depressed, anxious all the time, I even remember crying whole fucking day on the birthday, I try to hide my sorrow always but that day my mum also felt that something is not well with me, she tried hard to know why I am so upset, although later we had a birthday dinner outside, the person was still there, he didn't left my side. Yup, the good thing that happened and I remember is my mum get her 2 cellphones crashed after giving them a good bath at Elliot's beach. :P
June, I thought that its enough of grieving, now I have to get my life back on track, I started working out because it can only help my mind to be stable and tired body falls asleep easily. Although I am not consistent till date so no such transformation.
In June I met someone, someone who is a very good friend of mine, from the day we got to know each other and till today, he is one of my very good friend, he has always been there for me, listening to my rants, explaining me to let go of people, helping me to practice gratitude everytime when I used to cry over calls, and helping me in every possible way. I remember drunk dailing you as well. LOL. Arihant, if you are reading this, I want to say Thank you to you, thank you for always being there and for being a guiding angel for me. Loads of love to you.
July went in shopping, eating and travelling. I went to my friend's engagement, although the train was running quite late those days, I still loved the change in environment, I love travelling solo and the return trip was quite tiring and adventurous but its fine.
August is the month of rakshabandhan, I got a huge amount of money as rakhi gift from my brother, obviously I am not sharing the amount here, I started working as a freelancer since August. My brother purchased his own car, proud and happy moment it was, I wish him all the success and happiness to him.
In September, I realized that some people just come in your life to teach you how to deal with pain and sufferings and learn to heal and grow. I got my tooth extracted and managed everything on my own. I love to deal woth pain all alone. I started giving time to things I like to do, I started gardening again, redeveloped the habit of reading but this time I said no to romantic fictions. I started reading spiritual books and all of them helped me to get better in life, reading changed my perception to see and deal with things, I evolved as a better person. September 2022, I celebrated Ganesh puja with my society members with enthusiasm, it felt good going out and meeting people everyday as I was hibernating before that.
October, did a lot of shopping this month, went home via road after years having the first long journey of the brand new car. Celebrated Dussehra with family, came back and again wet home for Diwali, this year we decorated the home with many fairy lights, ya I remember, we hanged 65-66 strands of fairy lights and lightened up the house with 100 diyas. This year it was a truly a happy diwali after a long time.
October was good, as someone entered my life again, someone with whom I connected so easily, I felt that we are quite compatible, October seemed be a happy month, smiling faces, thrill, fun, gala time and everything.
November was good too. November was all about traveling, we went to explore Chhattisgarh, 2-3 trips only. I went for my friend's wedding, enjoyed there and met my old college friend, it felt so good to know that people genuinely care for me, I mean sometimes they just do things even though I haven't asked them, because they know what will make me comfortable and being there for all those time when I was there. Thanks to him as well without mentioning the name.
December doesn't turned out so well, I had to say no to the person I felt could be the best choice if I marry him but again things weren't in my favour, it was little heartbreaking for me but I am fine now but I said yes for someone about whom I was so unsure, my heart could not accept him even after trying hard, I had a feeling that I deserve better than him but for the sake of my parents'happiness, I said yes for this alliance but as I say life has its own plans, things ended there as well giving me a sigh of relief, atleast I am at peace now. I have all the hopes that someone will walk into my life someday with whom everything will fall in place and I will be ready to accept him in my life completely.
As they say, January shows dreams and December brings reality. Similarly, I haven't accomplished any of the goals I wrote here few months back. Neither I lost a significant amount of weight nor I found a job, neither visited the places I mentioned nor I registered for the startup company. Everything is still pending in the list.
Anyways, I am still happy, grateful for all the good things that happened to me and thankful to the bad circumstances as well, as it helped me to understand that all that happens is a phase of life and it shall pass and I can come out of it stronger everytime. Now, I don't get upset over things, I keep hope that everything will turn out to something good at right time and right place.
Saying goodbye to 2022 and hoping that forthcoming year will bring all the good things and happiness into my life. :D
PS- I will keep editing this one as I will add something whenever I will feel like I should write this and that too. :P