I cut again:(
I had to do it.
After cutting and crying I started feeling happy and relief and I was having this high and I posted selfies of myself and I didn’t care if you could see my cuts and in one of them i purposely showed them, I stopped giving a fuck and I just started screaming and crying and singing and dancing, it looked like I was on something but I wasn’t and even though I did still cut I think I made some progress because I haven’t been able to express myself like that without drinking 🫶🏽 And I’m proud of myself for staying sober for a good amount of time and not giving into alcohol when feeling sad. But sadly actions have consequences and everything I posted on my insta and twitter concerned my friends, they started texting me but I left them on read and so just a couple minutes ago I lectured by my best friend.
I feel so guilty but at the same time wtf do you want from me? I’m really struggling rn and I have a lot of emotions, let me express them however I want, if someone is triggered by my fresh cuts on my posts then they can simply just unfollow, I don’t fucking care. That’s their problem not mine. That’s like throwing a a tantrum cuz people on twitter triggered you like what do you expect…it’s twitter😐…
Anyways…
The high is gone and I am now stabled, u don’t feel anything but at least I don’t feel off balance.