Dear Diary,
I know, i know, It's only august.
But the flowers of winter has started here already. You remember i told you about these flowers 🌼🌼 once, on the way to home, they have this pleasant smell, in the evening. They have come. It's beginning of the holidays now, ganesh chaturthi, then durga pooja, dasahara, diwali then my bday, chrismas... The winter ❤️❤️.
I love this weather, the light chill in the air. It takes me back to the college canteen, durga puja vacation, year 2013. The yellow lights, the big tree and us.
Bas ek khwab.
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A lot of times, our brain is only feeling what our bodies are feeling. Went to park for walk, and i am as good as new now. I feel like just doing stuff for the sheer joy of doing things and not asking for a reason and meaning. I like reading books, i like writing, i like programming, I like making things. The meaning will follow, but more important is that i enjoy what i am doing. Feynman said the same, he didn't do it all because he thought of uplifting humanity, he did it because he enjoyed doing it all.
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A slight thing is there in my mind, i somewhat miss her, maybe i always will, but somewhere i also have peace, that she is probably happy right now. And so i can be too. It's not hurting right now. Although i have always known that life can give surprises, but i think i may not really find that love again ever in life, but that should be ok, i understand that not everyone will get everything in life. But I'll live life as it comes like Ella said.
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I had a very bad dream today. About Manisha and Nani. In the dream, I didn't feel very sad, i just accepted it. After waking up when I thought of it, I felt very sad. In our lives, our own chasing, we get so lost, that we forget about our family, people who love us and really care about us. We become so distant from them until someday we are reminded again.
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Passenger was 27 when he wrote the song, 27. And he is 38 today, and he still writes beautiful songs. I can imagine, how life can be so beautiful. To find your love and your love stick with you.
Drawing parallels with him, i found my love when i was 17 and i am 27 now. I don't know if my love is with me or not though =D. Depends on what we call love ;)
It's beautiful, but it hurts you too. As Kahlil Gibran said, For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you.
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Love ❤️❤️
--panda--