Dear Diary,
This is a phase, where i am going through a lack of inspiration. This whole weak i was sitting, doing different things, reading different materials, talking to people on linked in etc. But i think the real reason why i took this break, Astronomy and decoding the human brain etc is getting blurred. I do not know what i can do and i am not getting any new ideas. I am not consistent with it, i am more sort of getting lost into the same monkey race again, running after technology, languages etc, there is no limit to that ocean and I don't need to learn all those things may be to pursue the real things, those are just escapes.
But what should i do then, i decided last week that I'll have to do some job in the field to learn this. I cannot do it on my own, i have very little domain knowledge. And i am not finding any right opportunity. I don't feel like startup again.
I don't know how steve jobs could do it.
On the other hand, i am also just getting scared as time passes, day after day, no paycheck, money not growing automatically. It's only depleting. I know i know, i thought about it all earlier when i decided to take this break, that this may happen, and i may feel worried, and that time that's what i told myself, That since i understand it, i wont let these worries overtake my dreams. My pursuit of doing meaningful things. Yet, today it seems difficult.
I think it's just the fomo thing and also the Europe thing. But europe is not moving anywhere, it's going to remain there as long as i am alive. I can go travel later in life. So it's just the FOMO then. It's stupid to fall in the trap again. (I don't know how did this same trap sounded so awesome 5 days ago 😮😮). I should keep looking for more ideas in astronomy and maybe look for jobs/collaboration with people in the space exploration industry. Do not be worried, something or other, at least for the same money you'll find a job, don't worry. And you don't have to prove it to anyone.
So, here is the thing, i think i should get back to the real thing again, reduce my distractions. And keep reading.
Goodnight ❤️❤️