January 26, 2022

 

Dear God, I hate to think about money. Should I go to work?

Or how to live? I am done by living with this family.


Today's morning was so painfully for me. From the one side I feel like I am so unneeded. From the another I feel me so hated by others. I feel there me like they hate me so, so much. And so, so deep


I don't know what to do. How to live. And how to solve this money question. If I will think about this [and only]. I am just not pretty sure this is the best idea ever.


I don't want to go to work.

I don't think this is the great desicion. I don't think that woman need to work. I ma sure that man is ENOUGH and that woman should be at home. I know that this is the way to have happy living. God, if you have other throughts about this, please. Tell me about it 


Today I was so angry in the morning. I have shown the worst character. But... Being honest. I am sure this is for the great. 


I don't have enough money to go to K. I don't have enough money even for just being alive 


I am so tired. That others are interested only in money I can create. God, if money this is the only way I can bless others. I don't need this life


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