The number 5's Dear Diary

Dear Diary,Well, haven’t whined in a few days. Learning fast I wasn’t the nourishing parents. Colton has a good old case of the flu. Callie took care of so much with that kid. I was more of the shake it off and keep going parent. He is so under the w

Dear Diary,Well, the day went much better than I thought Colton opened presents. He did ok with it. The things Callie got him, he opened, but left them in the wrappings from the store never said a word, then after we finished the took them to his roo

Dear Diary,Colton is asleep, he was worn out so I had time to get his stuff out I know he doesn’t still believe in Santa, but it is the first without his mom, she was so into Christmas, Callie had already bought 99% of his gifts All that was left was

Dear Diary,Up early even for me, read the transcript last night still have not listened to the recording. I checked on Colton at least a dozen times last night. It’s going to be a long day I want to talk to him about what I read, but my gut says not

Dear Diary,Colton finished discing for the year I got the yearlings tagged and worked. Then cooked dinner. Colton gave it a C- that is my best grade yet on dinner. The investigator that worked Callie’s and Colton’s accident came by to talk and update

Dear Diary, Colton had a great day. I picked him and Carey up from the field. The first words out of his mouth Dad loves that 9520R we could keep it right, Auto steers are so cool. He is being his old self, looks happy, sounds happy, acts happy. Toda

Dear Diary,Guess it’s not getting up early when you do it every morning 3 am. Not sure why my body picked that time. Start the coffee. Someone sent me a single cup something to make coffee. Colton showed me how to use it, like my coffee pot on the s

Dear Diary,Rode the tractor most of the day. Colton had a great time with Carley and her family. I managed to get about 100 acres done. So good day, I wasn’t sure about letting Colton go, but glad I did, He walked out of here smiling, guess until we

Dear Diary,Be kind of short today or at least for now. Have a lot of ground to cover work wise. Colton is going with Carey and her family to some Christmas carnival fair festival thing. He’s functioning somewhat so maybe getting out with Carey will h

Dear Diary,Up early again 3:25 am making coffee building a fire in the stove to help knock the chill out. Checked on Colton, still asleep (of course he is, it’s 3:30 in the morning). I find myself waking up and going and just looking in his room seve

Dear Diary,Well, everyone kept telling me it would hit Colton in stages and something would set him off I have no idea what set him off but he finally had a melt down Me: Colton you have your school thing in the morning till noon (he is on a cattle

Dear Diary,Well, it was a long day up at 4:30 am mixed feed and put out 35 rolls of hay. Didn’t feed for Colton, after him getting mad and telling me he was not 5. Took him to the café for breakfast first time to go on Sunday morning Since Callie pas

Dear Diary,So here it goes Callie and Colton had gone to a school program. I was out of town, taking a load of cattle to Colorado. They were heading home and it was raining pretty hard, we have a section of road that has the worst hair pin curves in

Dear Diary,Went to the city got all the errands done for the week got TV dinners per Colton. Colton hung out with one of his buddies when I got back, he had found a teaming roping about an hour from the house. He was so excited winners got a belt buc

Got Colton off to school since he had a bad night at breakfast, I ask him if he wanted to stay home and sleep in before I couldn't even finish, he said no I can't miss school, he paused and said I have a test. Who knew the secret to getting him to ge

Dear Diary, I'm back. I'm hungry but I'm trying to lose weight.  I was going to make one of my favorite salads,  which isn't healthy at all.  But I didn't,  I drank a can Coke (empty calories) and cleaned the kitchen,  there are clothes in the washer

Dear Diary, I'm back on medical leave so money is tight. I'm just not feeling it, actually I feel like a total fuck up. On top of that I'm not keeping my home clean. I was always a clean person,  but lately I couldn't care less.I think I'll force m

God, being honest, I have started to have the fear of D. I am not pretty sure about X. Maybe it's all my guilt - cos I communicate with X? Maybe X is not from You. [Maybe it means no]Always

Dear God, I am terrified of these sounds. What about was this messege that I have received yesterday? What does it mean?

Dear God, what is going on? What should I do?..

Dear God, I am afraid

Dear God, I don't want to go. Nowhere. I am very jelous about C and also N. I am very abgry at X for absence of P... God, I don't feel me value. I judge myself cos of... Cos of... Cos of... Low esteem. Connected with unhealthy face. I want to

Dear God, I am so afraid.

Dear God, I am feeling bad.

Dear God, I am worrying about... D. And also... P has said that war is going to be long. I can't say I has liked it a lot

Dear God, I am so tired... When I have heard what is going in with B and S in B... And of H of K... Just no words, just no words. My heart is broken. So broken, so broken. I think X hasn't done nothing to change thd situation. Isn't it?

Dear God, again and again I fall in TT question... I don't see my days too productive. I am too jelous of M, if V. I hate and very angry at X. Just hate X. X tries to rule me. When X has no options and opportunities to do it. I have said X that I

Dear God, I don't know what to do. It looks like the situation over my control... I can't get it... I am.so tired from it all. I am tired that I can't change. Nothing. That it is too serious. Too serious. Around me. Too much. Too much. W

Dear God, I have so many doubts. I am there, in Ukraine. And... Being honest, I am so tired from thinking too much. My brothers and sisters are in the very bad condition right now. X says again and again. Come to. He can't. To decide thin

Dear God, You know that I am jealous, isn't it?

Dear Gid, I am so tired from having all those moments of... You know. I was jelous of M and Y. Cos of V and A... God, I am not sure at X. And I don't know... Looks like... Nothing. God... I am tired. From doing too much. I am worder mayne

Dear God, help me, plz. Its hard