Dear Diary, My shift for today was only 4h and it takes 3h in total to commute. I enjoyed 1h of window shopping. I will have arrived at home by 7pm.
In the Morning, I had to deal with morning anxiety again. I think I got off my bed at 9. I knew it was because of my late bedtime which was 2am or something. How many times I gonna regret this till I get healthy enough to live my own life?
I believe that to fall asleep, I need to listening to gentle asmr or white noise and fill in diary before I close my eyes. But I don’t really think so. Especially filling diary makes me more awake in addition of the good effect of relaxation. Yes, blue light!
So it feels like I should do the before-bed-diary before I take bath. And I may try to sleep without music tonight.
Before I left home, I copied some coloring pictures from pinterest to my sister. Because since yesterday, she seemed easily distracted by the voice and sounds she heard. And she liked to do coloring to do not focus on her hallucination.
She started to make notes a lot this week. One of them is for what’s in her brain with numbering. It looks like bullet journal kinda thing. But I actually donno what is this for. cuz there are lots of her imaginary world stuffs (like her fav celebrities things) besides her daily routine like singing time and YouTube time. And the other note is usually took on a copier papers. It basically looks like being used for recording the voice she hears.
I gonna go bed on time tonight and I gonna get off the bed on time tomorrow morning.
I will probably come here again later.