Dear Diary, I’m in a strangers home right now and I am alone. About two days ago I was in a very nice hotel with an ex who is a truck driver. We are no longer together due to the fact of me not wanting to have sex. When we originally got together, I thought it was a relationship type of situation. At some point I started looking at my situation and realized that he was only wanting to have sex. It was no relationship at all. Every time we would have home time off of the truck he would go spend a night with his ex and or be gone all day and leave me at a hotel alone. He also wouldn’t answer any phone calls nor text message.
Now, I’m in a strangers mother’s house with a bag of chips, pickles and some skittles looking for help out of this situation. I would call on family but as the black sheep of the family, they have decided a long time ago not to help me. Hell, about two years ago I was sleeping in the backyard of their house that they still owned even though they lived in a different state at the time. My sister was still living there but when I asked to stay my father said no. But that definitely wasn’t the first time so…. I don’t feel the need to continue the pattern.
This is my fault though. I’m over 30 and I should definitely have my shit together better than this. My decisions for myself have never been great.