June 01, 2021

Hey. I need to vent. It's been 6 moths since I've had a job. I've applied to basically every field there is (at least it feels that way) since December. Ever since then, I was really upset that I hadn't found a job after two months. Then all of a sudden, my moms job let her go. I felt more pressure to find a job. I started to get really stressed so I stopped looking for a while. I finally started looking again and had an interview. I haven't heard back from that company since the interview. So, I started putting more applications in, got stressed, took a break. My cousin moves out, now the pressure is really on because my family will look at me like, why hadn't I made a move yet. Now I'm not working, nor do I have my own place. My mom asked me this morning what I would do if she were to die. More pressure was added to my plate to think about because if she were to die, not only would I be homeless, I wouldn't have a car or a phone to even get a job. I feel like this huge disappointment, like I've let so many people down, and that I'm behind in life.