January 25, 2021

 

Dear Diary,


Ryan is pissed I won’t go home. I told him if he made me I would just leave again. He said he wants to tell my parents I’m here so I won’t stay long because I am worried he did.

We did watch football last night and ate pizza. I have so much to tell him and I don’t know where to begin because now he has clouded it all with the discussion about our parents. 

He does seem a little better. I don’t think he is drinking near as much as he was. Although he still has a picture of Rebecca and him on his night stand table. That still hurts how she died! It hurts that I wasn’t there the day that happened! 

Of all people in this world, I can’t bear to think of him not happy or doing well. 

He won’t stop talking about me going home and how I should. He said I am not going to have much of a life if I continue this. What does he know anyway?!

I just want to be here and enjoy the moment and he keeps ruining it!

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