October 7, 2020

Dear Diary,

Homeless shelters are not an ideal place to stay overnight. There are missing people posters hung up on a wall so I don't think I will be staying there again. My picture wasn't up there but in case it ever is, they won't be able to locate me.

I did watch two homeless men fight over a blanket and a cot. We are talking punching and screaming kind of fight. The weird thing is, there was plenty of cots and blankets for everyone.
I am sitting in a park right now. It is a nice fall day. Nice breeze and kind of cool out. I see people walking by and I just wonder if they have any life similar to mine. Are they happy? How do they deal with things I have? Is it normal to have to deal with the things I have had to deal with? Do they have any worries in life?
I am weird, but I am sitting here and as people walk by, I give them back stories on their lives. Pathetic maybe, but it is some form of entertainment that is free.
I'm still so confused on everything. I miss my brother, a lot, but I shouldn't be around him. Even though I want to. He has a way of making me feel special and I am usually very happy when I am around him.
I will have to find a way to make money today. I haven't eaten since before I left. I am not going to sit with a sign and beg for it. That isn't something I feel comfortable doing.
I am 15 and sitting with a sign on a weekday would raise questions to why I am not in school. I don't steal either, I have a conscience.
I think I will be able to find a man who will pay me. There is a lot of "single looking" men in this park walking around.
Judge if you want, this is my life right now.